As the Philippines brings home two titles - Miss Earth and Reina Hispanoamericana 2017 today, I think that now is the perfect time to remind young girls of their worth and how they can be queens in their own ways. I wrote this piece 3 years ago on my blog but I feel that it still rings true today.
"The evolution of how women are portrayed in the Philippines will give you, the modern Filipina, an instant power boost. I'm delighted to share that our country has one of the narrowest disparity when it comes to gender gap. We play important roles in the family, in the community and in the country. This is actually a good thing. What's not good, however, is that little remarks blurted out in everyday conversation don't seem to reflect this fact. There exists that stereotypical description of what and how a girl should be. These comments can be traced down to the conservative nature of our culture. Not that I find anything wrong with being conservative, but when being conservative gets in the way of your developing self-esteem, it's time we should be basing these restrictions to reason, not to the discriminatory nature of how women were seen during the era of colonization.
If you go for what you want and you get the remark, "ambisyosa" (ambitious) because you do just that, ask yourself, "Is what I'm aiming for helping me to be the best I can be? Does it challenge me? Is what I'm doing right for me and for the people I love and the people around me? Is it in accordance with my principles in life?" If to all you've got a big YES as answer, then turn a deaf ear to the negative comments and do your thing. I decided to go with ambisyosa as the perfect adjective to describe me because I wanted the word to have a positive impact in my life. I'm turning the negative notion of the word into something positive.
If you wear short skirts and get the "igat" (flirt) comment, ask yourself, "Am I wearing this for myself, because it's comfy? Am I dressed for the occasion? Is the place I'm going to, safe?" If another whooping YES resonates, then strut your stuff girl. I believe that your choice of clothing gives others a view of who you are, your personality. How you dress is one of the best ways to express yourself, so send the right message.
If you get all emotional because of a break-up or a bad day and you want to take it down with a poem, a song, or a facebook post and you hear comments of how you are overreacting ask yourself, "Am I doing this with the sole intention of getting rid of the bad feeling and not because I want to hurt other people in the process? Am I doing this to express myself just right? Am I not giving away too much? Should I talk to a friend about it first?" Decide after you have answered these and you will thank yourself later.
Always put that ability to overthink to your advantage. You are smart, little girl. Make mistakes but make them calculated mistakes. Never let the remark "babae man gud" (you're just a girl) limit you.
The next time you hear someone say, "babae man gud..." (you're just a girl) answer with, "mao bitaw nakaya nako" (that's why I made it)."
I got that crown in the picture by winning a university pageant, by the way. Four years have passed since my reign, but I think that the essence of being a queen still hasn't left me. And for me, the real meaning of being a queen is to empower those who are feeling weak; even if that person turned out to be you.
Thanks for taking the time to read this post. Have a good week ahead :)