Marriages!!! We all have our various thoughts of what marriage is. To some it's the joining of two people together . To some people in some parts of the world it's the coming together of two hearts.
Now I am from Nigeria and in this part of the world, a marriage is more than bringing two people together. It involves way more than falling in love and wearing a wedding band along with promises of staying with your spouse for life. Marriage in Africa involves a whole lot more than all of this. It involves joining of families and a lot of traditions.
I was opportuned to photograph a traditional wedding late last year and I was really fascinated by all the traditions and customs that differ with each traditional wedding. Being an event photographer, I am privileged to experience different customs of joining two families. Nigeria being a very multicultural society boasts of over 500 languages , with all these tribes having their very own unique cultures and marriage rites.
The culture I will be sharing with you today is from the Kwale culture of Delta State, Nigeria. A lot of cultures may have similar traditions to this in their traditional marriages but it varies a lot when you move to other parts of the country.
It is really important for all parts of a traditional marriage ceremony to be captured appropriately. Traditional marriages in Nigeria are usually held in the homes of the brides . This is because it is expected that the groom in question come with his family to request for the hand of his wife-to-be in the proper custom of the bride's family.
BRIDAL PREPARATION
The bride prepares for the ceremony as she is expected to look radiant like a beautiful flower.
No expense is spared when these preparations are made as it is expected that the groom's family properly appreciates who it is they are coming for.
Because the ceremony is conducted in the home of the bride, the customs and traditions of the bride holds supreme notwithstanding where the groom comes from. When shooting traditional marriage ceremonies , it is important to capture shots of all the bridal accessories from clothes
to traditional beads and every other piece of adornment.
The bride completes her preparations while everyone awaits the arrival of the groom's family.
ARRIVAL OF GROOM'S FAMILY.
The arrival of the groom's family may or may not be treated with a lot of pomp and pageantry as in some cultures the groom's family are treated like strangers who have come bearing gifts in search of a treasure.
Some cultures hold prior introduction ceremonies to get to know each other before the traditional marriage ceremony. Others hold engagement ceremonoes prior to the traditional marriage ceremony. The grooms family come with a few key gifts and a spokesperson who is familiar with the culture of the bride's family. The groom is made to wait until he is needed as it a custom for the elders to handle the proceedings of the ceremony.
CEREMONY
The prayers are said by an elder and the ceremony begins in earnest. The bride's family presents kolanuts as a symbol of their welcoming spirit and readiness for the ceremony.
There is a popular Nigerian adage that says "he who brings Kola brings life . The kolanuts are broken and shared between everyone present. This is a symbol that the bride's family is ready for the day's ceremony. The bride's family also offer some money on a plate.
This is also a sign that they welcome the groom's family with open arms. This is a sign for the groom's family to present the gifts they came with so they present all the gifts ranging from food items to drinks of all kinds.
When this is accepted by the bride's family . They inquire about the mission of the groom's family. A very knowledgeable spokesperson is needed for this as it determines to a great extent how the rest of the ceremony goes.
When the groom's family have made their intentions known, the bride's family requests for the groom and he is summoned in to be seen by all present.
The groom is meant to be "seen but not heard" so he remains quiet while the ceremony goes on.
THE BRIDE-PRICE
When all intentions have been made known, the bride's family presents their visitors (the groom's family) with a list of items required by the culture.
This includes drinks, money, food items, pieces of clothing and the bride price. Now as much as the term 'bride price' sounds like what it is - a price for the bride , it doesn't actually mean that the bride is being bought. It is seem as a symbol that the family of the groom appreciates who they came for. The bride price in general is usually a really small token but it's importance is very important in traditional marriage ceremonies.
The acceptance of this bride price by the bride's family means that they are ready to be joined together with the bride's family . It means that they are ready to let the groom's family into their lives.
The bride is then called into the ceremony wearing a veil.
The groom is meant to unveil the bride and confirm she is the one he wants.
After this has been confirmed, the bride and groom are officially husband and wife by tradition.
She is welcomed into the family by the groom's mother and other women in the groom's party.
This is followed by prayers for the couple by both parents. It shows that they bless and agree with the union of the bride and groom.
Now that all formalities are over, food is served and all the guests eat their fill as they celebrate with the couple.
The eating and drinking ends with closing prayers and a lot of pictures are taken to mark this monumental event.
All images and texts here are original.