It might sound a bit psychotic but even death does not scare me as much as living a boring life. There is a multitude of things that can become routine and eventually just straight up boring. I like being constantly stimulated by different experiences. That fear has affected my life negatively and positively. Sometimes I am living in the moment and I begin to question when will this action I'm doing will become boring.
Initially, when I began college I was set on becoming a pharmacist but as the semesters went by I realized that nature of the job was not meant for me. Daily repetitive routines are boring and therefore I would become miserable a couple years into it. In having this realization I decided to have a less routine kinda career, more project based work. That's when the chemist in me came out. Even if it is probably very under-payed and arguably more difficult, at least I won't be bored. Planing for the future and understanding how I function is a pivotal part of being happy. The positive affects are apparent but so are the negative ones.
Constantly fighting boredom in a daily basis makes un-attentive and I tend to get distracted easily. Sometimes I'm in my own world I forget to listen to people. I don't mean to be rude my brain just defaults to things I find interesting. Fighting boredom also makes me want to do things 24/7. Sixteen hours is just not enough for me, I want to keep doing and doing stuff that is fun. Having that drive can be a positive thing for school since I've actually studied 16 hours straight. The bad thing is that it only works if I find the class interesting.
So what happens when I don't get my daily fix of fun?
When I'm off school I tend to just turn into an alcoholic, or I begin to smoke cigarettes. It something to do, rather that, than be bored and do nothing. Wanting to be constantly doing something makes have an addictive personality. I don't just read a book passively for weeks, I binge read it in one 18 hour sitting. Or in the case of video games I play until the campaign is over. In relationships ( with the little experience that I've had) it makes me choose girls who are always fun. Ironically I don't like extroverts, so it leaves me with a more limited pool to choose from. When I get into a relationship is more about when I will be bored not if. That's part of my fear lets say I find a perfect partner only to be bored by her a couple years down the line. If I get bored I will leave. The worst part of all of this is that I'm an introvert.