Ever broke through a wall of anxiety only to find yourself reawakened and transformed at the other side? And before you ask - no - I didn't spend my weekend high on shrooms finding the answers to all the mysteries of life (or did I?😱).
Jokes aside, if you would look up my last weekend in a dictionary it would be a direct translation of utter shit. I spent the majority of my Friday and Saturday walking around in the swamps of anxiety, only to find myself sitting at a south-western rock bar with a large beer in my hand and a plate of nachos in front of me. I thought to myself:
Is this what I've gotten myself into? Drinking my sorrows away while being consumed by the depths of despair?
Perhaps, but that didn't stop me from ordering another beer though, and speaking to Rob, the owner of the bar who seemed to like me. Maybe I reminded him of a long-lost son of his, that had finally reappeared this forlorn night.
For three hours I sat at that bar, contemplating my current direction in life and what goals I'm pursuing. I scribbled my notes onto a notepad while Rob served me a another drink.
And I don't know what he put in that drink but that night I had a spiritual purge. Something I only experienced a couple of times in the past, last time that I recall having a similar experience was when I were living with monks in India, but that's another story.
For hours I was in a state that I would most closely compare to a ego-dissolving experience, and I realised that in front of me was an invitation to take my spiritual growth to the next level, to unlearn and let go of my ego a little bit more and to evolve.
While I sadly don't sit here today with all the answer's to my problems I came to a profound realization that I need to change my approach to some things in life. The most important being: my overall social media presence and my direction here on Steemit.
Because the thing is, the William you see here on Steemit is indeed 100% real and true to himself. Although, it isn't the whole spectrum of who he is.
While I truly love self-development and writing long, serious articles on how to become a better you; that isn't everything I am, and I do no longer want to live with this fucking strait-jacket imposed by society and social norms.
Soon enough we all be dead anyway, and to spend time and energy worrying about what other people think, or trying to "portray" yourself in a perfect manner to people you never met is fucking retarded. And I'm not saying you should be rude (or maybe you should be?) and just say fuck it to everything, but I'm saying that you should be you, and step away from the social programming that I truly believe drains your soul.
Steemit in particular in the way it's built doesn't really encourage people to be themselves fully. Let's admit guys, this whole place in many ways is a just a big circle-jerk where everyone is nice to everybody in order to gain some extra followers, earn more money and to avoid the scary.. DOWNVOTE 😱
And also, have you seen the trending page? It's almost embarrassing to show new people the platform and reveal the posts that get the most upvotes. And NO, I'm not being one of those pessimistic motherfuckers saying to hell with everything, what I'm saying is that this platform as it is in its current state supports a community where people are walking on glass, trying not to step on anybody's toes.
So what am I suggesting?
Fuck trying to be something your not or censoring yourself for others to like you. Instead focus on what truly matters in the long-run; meaning 1) your well-being and enjoyment and 2) the true relationships you build here.
A question you could ask yourself is WHAT you would write about and HOW you would write it if money wasn't an integral part of this platform. At least that's what I will be doing from this time and on.
Likely (and hopefully) some people will feel indignant by this and tell me to go fuck myself since I don't know what I'm talking about. And likely, some people out there will strongly resonate with what I'm saying, allowing for deeper and more fruitful relationships to flourish.
This whole experience we call life is just a trip anyways.
From here on you'll still see me writing my articles and producing my videos. Just without any censorship.
And please don't leave a comment that says "Great article!", we both know you didn't read it..
Talk to you soon.
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