Do you typically refer a long term client out after there’s a rupture/intense fight in a session? She feels ineffective and gave me referrals for therapists with more training in dialectic therapy. I didn’t request Dialectic therapy!

Based on things you’ve shared in the past, this therapist has been problematic for a long time now. Her main issue is lack of comfort or skill around client attachment.

I’m not sure that dialectic therapy is what you need, but if one of the referrals also works with attachment, then it won’t hurt for her to have the dialectic skillset and she’ll only use it if it’s helpful to you.

You can do your own search for a new therapist. Based on what you’ve shared about yourself I would say an attachment therapist would be the most helpful to you. The therapist can practice any modality, but the key is ability to welcome and work with client attachment. As for modality, I have found that therapists who practice the Internal Family Systems modality to in general be higher quality therapists than those who don’t, but that is a generalization and not true in every individual comparison. IFS is also a decent modality that’s proven to be quite effective for trauma survivors.