If you want to have a better relationship you have to improve yourself. How are you going to help inspire those around you to be better people if you aren’t willing to improve yourself? We all have the ability to influence those who are around us. Jim Rohn said it best. You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. So it stands to reason that those people will also have you as part of their average.
When it comes to our relationships, being able to improve ourselves is crucial. Our relationships are important. However, their times when relationships come to an end or we do something that creates strive in that relationship. No relationship is perfect, but we can strive to get better with every interaction with other people.
No matter if it is from a fight with your wife or you are going through the loss of a breakup. If you want the best out of the relationship and your life, you can’t just sit on your laurels. You have to be willing to work toward an ultimate goal. That goal could be a stronger relationship. A better means of communication. You may decide you want to have a more, secure connection with your spouse.
How are you supposed to improve your relationship? Anytime our relationship gets a bit rocky, maybe we have some type of disagreement or other types of conflict, and our connection with that person breaks down. How do we repair that damage? Can we even repair that damage?
The answer is yes, you can repair a relationship. You can make a relationship stronger. But it takes effort from you.
Now you may wonder why I am putting all the weight on you instead of you and your spouse. That is because you can’t control your spouse. The only person you have control over is you. So how do you start having better connections with your spouse in particular And other people as a whole?
Work on the basics
as with everything in life, if you have a breakdown of a system, the best thing to do is to go back to the basics. Get simple before you get complex. So for you being a guy wanting to have a better connection with your wife, the best place to start is with the four pillars of The Relaxed Male.
Your 4 pillars
I have talked about the four pillars of The Relaxed Male many times. Because they are crucial for a well-balanced man in any scenario that he may face in today’s world. The basics of the four pillars allow you to become well-rounded and is a good foundation for you to start any self-improvement.
You are nothing if you do not have your mind. This is why improving how you think. Improving how you approach your world is all based on what you know.
Many men stop reading stop learning and stop growing shortly after they get out of college. They believe they know all that they need to know they’ve hated reading and have such a stigma on learning that they don’t have anything to do with picking up another book for a very long time.
That is a huge detriment to us men. We need to be learning new skills. We need to keep our minds active. Whether that is through hobbies or whatever is currently troubling us your mind is the only way you’re going to grow as a person.
Realizing when you’re doing stuff that is uncomfortable and being OK with that discomfort is needed almost as much as food. The price for your dreams and aspirations is the discomfort.
So how do you learn new stuff? A lot of that is through Books. Reading about a topic you are interested in or a challenge you’re facing allows for you to get a better insight to what you want to accomplish. Do you get better results when you are willing to read and educate yourself?
Besides books, there are plenty of other means of learning in today’s world. From Podcasts like the one you are listening to now to conferences to meetups the phrase where there’s a will, there’s a way is no more evident now than ever all you have to do is decide you want to learn.
The man’s body is your health. That old adage if you don’t have your health, you’ve got nothing into a lot of you being able to have that self-improvement that you’re wanting. If you want to have a stronger connection with your wife, nothing like getting in shape. If you want to have, the ability to show her you can’t protect her and your family from the bad guys. You have to be able to have endurance. You get endurance from exercise. Do you want to show your wife that you’re going to be around for the long haul? That is you get regular exercise and eat right.
What is your calling? What is your purpose? These are often meant as the same thing for, what feeds your soul?  men need a purpose to get out of bed. Men who are listless, angry, lost don’t have a purpose, or they have lost their purpose. Yet we need these drivers to ensure that our lives will be fulfilled. Our lives often become empty when we don’t have a sense of purpose.
This is the most important pillar that us men need to focus on. This is what allows us to work harder love deeper and have stronger connections with other people.
This Band of Brothers helps you become a better Man. They help you by sharing their lives with you. You acquire a better sense of masculinity when you are around other men regularly.
Other points that help
Well, the four pillars of Relaxed mail are great and they are a good foundation to have their other things you wanna do that help you improve your relationships by helping you improve yourself.
Failure is good
Know that anything you try is going to have the possibility of failing. We shy away from failure because it doesn’t feel good. It doesn’t give us a good sense of pride. It doesn’t shine a good light on our ability.
However, we learn from failure. We learn better ways of living our life when we fail at it. We learn what type of relationships we want as opposed to what relationships we don’t want. We learn what it takes to have a strong connected family that growing up from time to time. You can’t be a good friend to other men without offending them and saying things that they don’t agree with at different times.
Failure offers you the opportunity to grow learn and improve. It’s actually better to fail several times before you have success than to have immediate success. This is because you now understand why that success feels so good.
Pay attention to your ruminations
What is it you’re thinking of? When you face a problem and you have a failure what are you thinking about? That is what’s holding you back. Pay attention to what you are ruminating over. When you do, you can start understanding what thoughts you need to interrupt.
Get Better at Having Disagreements
We are going to have disagreements with our spouses, our relatives, and our friends from time to time. The key to having a strong connected relationship is actually knowing how to have disagreements and not having them mean whatever you make them mean.
Whenever you have a disagreement and you can accept that your spouse, your kids, your friend, your boss, or someone on the street has a different view. You can actually come to understand them better and more fully by having disagreements with them. Doesn’t mean you go around trolling other people for the sake of trolling, but when you have open and honest discussions about disagreements, you grow from that experience.
Don’t run from discomfort. Don’t run from the awkwardness of having a disagreement the emotions that you feel are strictly from the thoughts that you have.
Get A Coach
One way you can have a better relationship is also by getting a coach. They can help you step through the discomfort and the thoughts that you have that are keeping you from having the relationship you want.
If you like to be coached by me you can take the Next Step
https://www.youtube.com/live/WgjUYspMXjM?si=iN2wlNU300GZYwms
