We all need recognition. First of us to validate ourselves in our capacities, image and worth. Also, the recognition is also that pillar with which to establish the foundations of self-esteem in children, the impulse that the employee needs in his work and the bond that will erect a solid relationship between the couple, there where we know loved, valued, appreciated ..

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The concept of recognition, curious as it may be, sometimes leads to some misunderstanding. Some people see it as a negative dimension, because people who continuously seek that positive reinforcement from others are unable to maintain adequate emotional independence. They are, in the eyes of many, personalities who build their self-esteem based on the answers offered by others.

The concept of recognition, curious as it may be, sometimes leads to some misunderstanding. Some people see it as a negative dimension, because people who continuously seek that positive reinforcement from others are unable to maintain adequate emotional independence. They are, in the eyes of many, personalities who build their self-esteem based on the answers offered by others.

Do not despise anyone; an atom makes shadow ".

-Pitágoras de Samos-

Well, it must be said that the key to all this is in the balance. Because if there is something that we can not rule out, it is the great relevance that recognition has in our relational, social and emotional fabric. Moreover, if we remember now Maslow's pyramid of needs we will see that recognition occupies a prominent place. It is at this point in the hierarchy that this subtle harmony between self-recognition or the ability to feel competent with ourselves is contained, with the importance that others also value what we are and do.

Recognition, a form of personal and social dignity

The human being lives in a constant duality. We all like to feel present in an environment, but at the same time, we also enjoy being absent, feeling free, independent and sometimes separated from our daily scenarios. Now, something that nobody can like is to be invisible. Being that figure that nobody sees or appreciates, that is not taken into account.

This is well known by the child who lives in the last rows of the classroom, in a corner of the courtyard with no one to talk to, with anyone to enjoy a rich and colorful childhood. The teenager knows that nobody values

but everyone sanctions. And he knows it well the person who does not feel valued by the couple, who lives in the storage room of the deepest loneliness and emotional bewilderment. Recognition is a psychic tendon that validates us with our reference groups and, in turn, dignifies us as people.

Because to recognize someone is to make them visible. It is to give presence, is to allow "to be", "to be" and to create oneself in freedom. It is to appreciate someone for what he is by giving him an affection that impels personal growth, but that does not restrict or invalidate. Recognition generates self-acceptance so that, in some way, we can also strengthen even more the muscle of our self-esteem.

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On the other hand, an aspect that we can not forget about self-esteem is that in that self-evaluative perception, the way we believe that others see us is also included. One thing can not be separated from the other. We are social beings and what others tell us or think about us will influence us in one way or another.

Recognition is important, but we can not depend exclusively on it

We are aware that few things can be more painful than rejection. Experiencing the abandoned or contempt within our social group of reference turns on our alarms and the panic button. Because the loneliness not chosen, the isolation caused by unhealthy, negative or careless links, generate suffering. Now, as we have indicated at the beginning, people must reconcile the recognition we give ourselves with that we receive from others.

Focusing our lifestyle based solely on external positive reinforcements generates dependence and discomfort. Therefore, it is important that we remember a simple aspect. The quality with which we recognize ourselves will in turn influence the way others value us. Let's give some examples. The employee who trusts in their skills, who feels skillful and safe will create a positive impact in their work environment. Your performance will be good and, on average, others will recognize your efforts.

Another example. The person who values himself, who feels fulfilled, free and autonomous builds much stronger affective relationships. That mature and secure character also awakens recognition and admiration, but never mutual dependence. No constant reinforcement is needed, nor will our happiness depend exclusively on whether or not we receive this positive recognition today. There is a perfect balance between what we give ourselves and what others offer us from the most absolute sincerity, from the most authentic affection.

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To conclude, we can not ignore this concept at present. Recognition is the basis of every society for a very simple reason: it favors inclusion. It makes the invisible present regardless of age, condition, ethnicity or character. Knowing how to recognize is also knowing how to want with intelligence, because who practices the healthiest recognition is able to validate the other for what is and not for what one would wish it to be.

We therefore learn to recognize each other, make people and needs visible through affection, availability and humility.

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