It was year 2013 when I had severe acne breakout. I was 3rd year in college, 18 years old and that was summer vacation. It was my first time and I know that it was just normal so I do not care at all. I still post pictures on my Facebook account without minding how I look with acne.
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I received a lot of comments asking what happened to me. Some even thought I had an accident. I cannot blame them but that was funny though, I got acne breakout just on my left cheek and it was swollen. The right side of my face was flawless and even pore less. I am glad my best friend thinks I am still beautiful with acne. I don’t think that way. But there’s no big deal.
People who know me that I suddenly bumped into will stop and not just greet me. They ask, “what happened to your face?” and I think that was the hardest question for me to answer because I do not even know. They will even give advice about my skin out of concern. It is okay for me but sometimes it is tiring. When it keeps on repeating, it feels like a big deal. When people notice my face and I see them so shocked and confused, I began being conscious about how I look. I even remember the time when people laugh at me and I suddenly hate myself. I feel that I am being judged because of having acne and I started to hate when they stare at me. It became a big deal.
It became hard for me to go to school. I still remember the days where I should cover one side of my face with handkerchief because I am so ashamed. Sometimes, I wear a mask because I just want to hide but needs to go out for some errands. It is uncomfortable and painful. I cannot even wear makeup or just powder to cover up. I envy girls who can do makeup, can cover those imperfections perfectly and can atleast feel confident with how they look. I feel worst.
I know a friend who has acne trouble with the whole face, she has been an inspiration to me. She is so strong. Even though people will throw negative comment on her, she doesn’t mind them. I talked to her because I wanted her advice, what she do to heal her acne and the emotional wounds she got from people who did not experience acne breakout and would not understand how it could be hard for someone to have acne.
She recommended me to go to a small derma center in Imus Cavite Philippines, Cavite Skin Clinic owned by Doctor Sarmiento. The consultation is free, the staffs and the doctor are very kind and accommodating. I just paid for the medication prescribed. There are a lot of patients going there so I needed to wait long. But it is very affordable and their topical and oral prescriptions are very effective. I have to take antibiotic for a week, use guava soap as my cleanser, put a toner, astringent and an acne lotion I got from the skin clinic. But I must go back to the clinic from time to time so they could checkup and track the changes so they could recommend medicines that will suit my skin condition. I diligently go back to their clinic because I find it so effective and they are well known and trusted. My acne had gone because of their help. So, I stopped going to their clinic for consultation but I still use their products.
It was year 2015 when my acne came back. I went again to the skin clinic and I am so desperate. I got depressed by that time. I can still remember when I lock myself in the room and cry for hours. I heard about Isotretinoin back then and I want to give it a try. It is expensive though so I beg for my dad to lend me money to buy Isotretinoin. It was so risky, but I am really desperate. Isotretinoin could be harmful and could make you more depressed but I do not care about those bad side effects. I did researching and most of the beauty gurus out there who had acne took Accutane, that made me more willing to take the pills.
I did not complete the 3-6 months Isotretinoin oral medication because I find it very expensive and I am getting more depressed. But I think, slowly getting rid of it made my skin better. My skin gets less oily and the acne dried out fast. But I am still looking for skin care products that will really help my skin.
My sister got breakout but not as severe as mine. I recommended her the Skin Clinic but it did not work for her. But she is patient and not afraid of testing out products. When we go to the mall and check out some skin care products, I was surprised that she knew a lot about it. The types of cleanser, the ingredients that are good for acne or other skin concerns, what are the best sellers, most popular and so on. I asked her when she started knowing about them. She seems like a skin expert, I thought. Then she told me that in her spare time, she watches vlogs from beauty gurus explaining about their acne story and skin care routine. Then, I also started watching blogs and reading reviews about acne stories and skin care routine. I found out that Korean skin care became so popular. I am enjoying watching them until now and some beauty gurus and skin care companies became my inspiration. I will link down below their YouTube channel.
https://www.youtube.com/user/ElaineMokk
https://www.youtube.com/user/joankeem
https://www.youtube.com/user/mypaleskinblog
https://www.youtube.com/user/YellowyCream
https://www.youtube.com/user/WISHTrendTV
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxRvUbTRkcTP8gBCFQt2Juw
I started this blog because my skin is improving a lot and I want to help those people who are still fighting with acne. I know our cases differ and what helped me might not work for you. But more than skin care routine and looking for products that will work for me, for us, my blog is intended to constantly remind girls, who are just like me that we are flawsome. We may have a lot of flaws, but we can still be awesome because what matters most is our perseverance to improve ourselves and a beautiful character that cannot be covered with makeup. Beauty is within. I still have scars, red and deep. My skin is not always at its best. Helping people helps me too. Reminding you, reminds me too that we do not have to be called flawless, but we are beautiful regardless of the flaws.
