Good evening Steemians!
Can't believe it's Monday already and even now it's slipping through our fingers. I was really glum thinking about going back to work and to my surprise today was the first day of my online class.
From Tales of the abyss drawn by Akami Fumio
I don't know what is with me with this lack of motivation, drive and passion. Certainly feels like depression, I was motivated last semester to go to seminars, community events, support groups, try to mingle with my peers with movie nights, window shopping. You know, try to have a life. For some reason, I tumbled along the way and I'm trying to find my way again of what is important to me and what I need to be doing. In my career I feel quite behind and stagnant, my skills are not developing on the job and what I'm studying doesn't relate to what I'm doing in the workplace. I just feel like I'm going through the motions. The day I finish my degree, I know it'll open up so many possibilities but at the same time. It will feel like a veil is lifted and I'll be wondering what's next?
DBS: Angel Guardians (Whis And Vados Theme) by HalusaTwin
I'm really sorry for the emotional post for last week but I was delighted to see so much support from the community, for that I am grateful.
Last night I didn't get much sleep, I was so apprehensive of what's to come this week. Bugs me not having availability not to push software because of bad scheduling, attempting to move equipment when we don't even know where our office will be next and who will still be working for the department. Everything is up in the air and so uncertain. I just want to get by the day without incident and continue with my studies. I my point of view, it's really poor aspirations for the department. But my growth and my health are far more important. And I've been neglecting my health last semester trying to do well in school.
I'm a bit worried I screwed applying for my potential jobs, with life being so crazy I had no time to update my resume. I had to get my transcripts and send my resume as soon as possible to continue working on my duties and fending off the homework monster. I hope my application didn't get filtered out. If so, maybe it wasn't meant to be and I can deal with less stress of a career change while working on school. It just surprises me that my coworkers think they could earn 75k to 100k. I dunno if it's ego or our value is really that high. I'm usually too critical on myself and undervalue my work and performance, it's a shame employers take advantage of that insecurity. I can only imagine what my next big opportunity might be. But whatever it is, I hope my heart is in it and I'll be doing some good in the world.
After coming home from the silliness at work, I was surprised I was so tired, I brewed a cup of coffee and still fell asleep. I guess my dog knew how stressed and tired I was because she didn't mind being a teddy bear this time. Usually she protests cuddling too close or being back to back. After my nap, I tried to focus on reading stuff for my latest class. But I just couldn't comprehend anything on the syllabus being so groggy. So YouTube's and stores was a lovely distraction XD until my mom and I decided to go to the gym.
DBS: Beauty Of The Beast by HalusaTwin
Today was leg day for me and first time going on the treadmill after 4 months I believe. And oh my goodness it was rough.
But at least I now have a baseline and plenty of room to improve. Usually my peers care for weight training exclusively but it would be neat to put my name on a leaderboard at work for running a mile in the least amount of time. Would be awesome if it were for $10 at whatever cryptocurrency by the end of the month.
At the moment it looks like I have to have a 6 day work week, I hope it doesn't get in the way of things
