Some people say that addiction is a disease. Others say it's just a form of "weakness". They can't put them in the same category as a kid with cancer or some other disease. They tell this now fully grown adult that they CHOSE this addiction. No one put a gun to their head and made them snort that cocaine or take that needle (or look at that porn, etc.) However, it is any less of a "disease" if it is happening to an adult? Are adults not worth just as much as children because they don't have the same sense of innocence? My personal thought is that addiction is neither a disease nor a weakness. It's merely a symptom of a disease or disorder. It's your coping mechanism that gets you through the day (or at the very least, gives you the illusion thereof). It's what you do BECAUSE of your disease or disorder. That could be the pain of fibromyalgia, or it could be how you act out because of your PTSD from trauma as a child. Most people have addictions BECAUSE they were never given the help or nurturing they needed AS a child. Some of us are stuck in the trauma that we had when we are children. We get triggered by a thought, memory, word, sound, smell, sight... etc... and it brings us right back to that moment of trauma or abuse from our younger days when our brains were still very pliable and forming. We have so many people suffering with addictions and everyone just tells them to grow up. When you tell a child to grow up, do they magically just do that? No. They get HELP. So, in conclusion, these man-childs (and woman-childs) need your help to get through this. This is not a fight they can get through alone. Maybe that is why you are in their life--- not to tell them to "man up", but because you already KNOW how to man up, you know that you could show them how to by helping them!