My Memories of Tyler, How a Stranger Became a Brother. A letter to my Friends Son...
(Tyler, Lewis & Courtney - Source Courtney Hurd Facebook)
Dear Lewis,
As of writing this your Father Tyler has just passed away. Your Mother Courtney asked each one of us to write down our memories on a piece of paper and to submit those to you. However I felt that small piece of paper was not enough to truly tell the story of your Father and what he has meant to me. I also wanted to show you that the story of your Father's life was not only influential and important to me and yourself but to many other people as well. That way the example Tyler set with his life can serve as an example for many others to follow. So I decided to write this down on Steemit, on the block chain to ensure it forever imprinted on the world, and to use the funds this post raises to help you with your future.
Who is this Tyler Hurd Anyway?
When Tyler and I met freshman year of college in 2004 at Roanoke College he was my roommate. Tyler and I quickly became good friends. First night I had brought a fake ID, so he and I went to the liquor store and bought about 200 beers or so. Then we threw a party in our dorm room, inviting the entire dorm (coed) and anyone else passing by. Within an hour we had about twenty people in a room built for two, and twenty minutes later the campus security arrived busting the party, forcing us to dump our beers and officially writing Tyler and I up for the first violation that our class would receive. This would be the first of many fun nights that would constitute the funnest years of my life in terms of partying and being a careless college kid.
The College Years
We would occasionally argue about what region had the best sports team, Maryland was his area and New England mine. Sometimes the argument would even go as far as who had the best hospitals or whatever. Tyler really loved Maryland and the whole Chesapeake area, so much so that whenever I go to that area I always think about Tyler. Driving through on the way to and from his funeral via Baltimore where we celebrated his bachelor party was tough. I will never see the Ravens on tv or go by Baltimore without thinking of Tyler.
Our normal tradition freshman year was after the day was over during the week, we would chill together at the end of the day. Generally I would say around 11 pm I would say goodnight to my girlfriend at the time, then would go back to my room and Tyler and I would watch one of a few terrible movies. The most often watched by a huge number was "Biodome". Hence jokes like this between us:
Sometimes in life I feel like we are in a bio dome type experiment, or test, and well Tyler like always would have passed the test and moved on to the next level first.
Becoming a Pike, Brothers for Life
Joining a fraternity, Pi Kappa Alpha was not something I would have done without Tyler. In fact Freshman year when we were living together and he pledged I thought he was making a massive mistake. I was like, dude "Why would you pay for friends?" among other arguments. I was completely wrong of course. Tyler like with the test of life; made the once in a lifetime next step into becoming a Pi Kappa Alpha brother first. The next fall I would follow in his footsteps mainly because I wanted to keep partying with him and Pi Kappa Alpha parties were exclusive. So a fellow friend Lee and I would join the next year.
Tyler would end up being my big brother in the fraternity. So Tyler was my big bro, Mike Sandler was Tyler's big bro and our fellow Rice members include Lee Beachum who was Tim's little bro. My little brother is Simmons, and so forth. That is the house of Rice basically. As far as big brothers go, they basically are there to provide guidance to the newer member of the frat. However Tyler took the role a lot further than that, and essentially became the older brother I never had. I always knew that if I needed to actually have someone listen to me and hear me and and help me, without any prejudice or anything that I could talk to Tyler. He lead by example as well, especially in the later years.
Tyler just like his truck was a huge part of our experience. The above photo is one of the pledge classes that I was the Pledge Educator for. Taking in new pledges and turning them into brothers is a huge part of the pledging process. I would like to think I did okay at scaring these younger kids into the type of men we wanted them to be. However, whenever I hit a road block, or needed advice on how to do this job better or how to handle any situation, it was normally Tyler I would go to for help. If I had a kid acting up, or not passing tests, I would go to Tyler and ask him what to do. Tyler was like that, someone you could go to for a reasonable explanation of what to do.
That is sort of who Tyler was to me. I would sort of go too far a lot and Tyler would just give me a big bear hug I could not escape from and calm me back down. Probably one of the only people in the world that I would even let do that without taking a punch at them.
Speaking of that truck, one of the nights we were doing an initiation ritual, we used Tyler's truck to transport the pledges. So we had the pledges blindfolded, and in the bed of Tyler's truck which had a tarp on it. Lee and I got pulled over by a local Roanoke Cop, and what ensued was the scariest 20 minutes of our life. The pledges had to remain quiet under the tarp, and we had to deal with the cops. By some miracle the cops never checked the truck, despite Lee having a suspended license. So after the cops left we let the pledges out of the back of the truck. Had they been found we would have had some serious explaining to do with multiple blindfolded pledges in the back of a truck.
One story we always had a collective laugh at was the night Lee, Tyler and I and one or two other people got some tequila and played a drinking game to the movie "Team America World Police". At the end of the game we started fighting in the hall, just goofing around shoving each other kind of thing when one of us went through the drywall. Then we realized how thin the walls were and came up with a new game. We started running into the walls leaving body size holes in them, similar to what you see in cartoons. After about 9 of these in the school dorms walls we stopped, a few days later the school fixed the walls. That weekend, we struck again. Except way worse, because we were planning it and got really, really well you know. Anyways, we stopped that time when Tyler of course went through two dry walls and ended up in a kids dorm room. The kid was pissed because he had a hole in his room's wall for like a week and a half.
Campus Security came and "investigated", by asking us what happened, so we told them some rowdy kids from another dorm kept doing it, and they believed us lolz. This time though when the school fixed the walls they put big new pieces of hard wood in the wall behind the dry wall so we would like break our shoulders if we did it again, so that brought the campaign of body holes to an end. Still one of the dumbest but most fun things I ever did.
Senior year Tyler, Will Smith, Arpan and I rented a house together at 427 Red Lane, 7 because we were always 7 minutes late. It was the best year of school for me, I had a ton of fun with Tyler and the other guys that year. At the end of the year another really good friend who I met through Tyler, Seth Dubee (best last name ever) moved in as well. We threw some epic parties, we had a glow in the dark beer pong room in the basement, we had two bars, a sun room that had the biggest spiders (I think they were brown recluse spiders) ever down there. It was the worst house ever, but the best guys ever.
Tyler introduced me to Old English 40's. Just want that to be known as a fact, still the cheapest way to get a buzz.
At Red Lane Tyler was the respectable one. You would come home from class and Tyler would be sitting there as Will said recently, "drinking Port and cutting $30 dollar cheese" lolz. Like who the hell does that in college? We would be scraping the couches for money for natty light.
Tyler came to stay at my parent's house for fall break one year. That was a good time, him and I basically set up shop in my mom's basement apartment and played NHL all week. We took a break to go see the film "The Departed" one day, we even smuggled in about ten beers each because we didn't want our buzz to get weakened during the film. Still probably the most fun I ever had at a movie, definitely the drunkest.
Your Father Tyler and I fought each other at the Salem Single A baseball game in a big glove boxing match. I would just like to say, I WON!!!! Lolz, barely and it was a very funny fight, Tyler had about 95% knocked me over when I regained my balance and finished him.
This last above image is from the formal Senior year. I can't even look at this photo without choking up with tears. It was basically the last big party we all had together, before our lives changed and we became adults. In the photo is Tyler, Arpan, Will and myself left to right, Simmons my little bro left the comment. I miss these guys, and the companionship we had more than they know. I have not made friends like these guys since graduating, I have many "peers" in the truth community and some friends have been made but I often feel as though I am alone.
Adult Life
Weddings and Funeral's, that is the only time we ever see each other anymore. It is a shame but it is true. If it were not for Tyler passing it could have been years before any of us saw each other again. The above image is from Lee's wedding, which is one of the best memories I have from the past few years. It was the last time we were all together and having fun.
I loved college life, and we had a great time. However all good things come to an end, and Tyler and I moved on to the next phase of our lives, each going our separate way. I would move back to Boston and he would move to the Richmond, VA area. We would both get married to our college girlfriends, (I later got divorced). We both had children and bought homes.
After college Tyler and I went our separate ways but always stayed in touch. Not as much as we wanted to but we still had some great memories. We would both go to each other's weddings as grooms men. I would attend Tyler's bachelor party in Baltimore which the guys still talk about today. I won't get into too much detail, but his bachelor party was a really fun night out in Baltimore. I made some new friends through Tyler that day, and hopefully we all can get together once and awhile and remember Tyler over a few beers.
We both attended each other's weddings. The above image is from the wedding Tyler and Courtney threw. It was an awesome wedding, we got to all stay in Urbanna, and they had a beautiful small venue, with the best grilled oysters I have ever eaten. We danced, drank and laughed. It was one of the best weddings I have ever attended easily, because of the people who were there. All people brought together by Tyler and Courtney.
Tyler provided an example for me of what it means to be a husband and a Father. I would have my struggles before finally settling down. I always looked up to Tyler during this time period. He had a solid marriage (mine fell apart), he had his own house (I was living in apartments), and he had a Son. My first Son was just born, so Tyler never had a chance to meet him. However Tyler's example was something I personally looked up to and wished to become. I have slowly started to become the man that Tyler was, but I doubt I will ever live up to his standard. Tyler passed the test of life, being a great husband, Father, friend and a brother.
What Tyler Left Behind
Tyler passed away at the age of 31, falling asleep with his son Lewis (pictured above) on his chest, and never waking up. The cause is unknown, the questions never ending. Tyler was taken from all of us for some reason we can't understand, and from a cause we can't define. He is just gone, leaving behind a loving Son, a loving wife and a lot of heartbroken people who miss their friend. The same friend we so foolishly believed would always be there.
I feel horrible for you Lewis, you lost the opportunity to spend time with your Father, time I got to spend with him that you never will. Tyler would have been the best Father you could have ever asked for. I am sure one day he would have bought you the below tractor and more. As Tyler was a teacher, I am sure he would have taught you about a great many things in this world. I also know that your education Lewis would have been extremely important to Tyler. I also know that if I had passed away, that Tyler would have done anything he could to help my family.
So Lewis, and readers. This is where the Steemit community can help me to help Tyler and his son Lewis. All I need is for you to up vote this story and re-steem it. Once this post pays out I am going to use 100% of the funds both SP power and SBD, and I will give those funds to Lewis for his education. Courtney already has a college fund set up, and I want to share this story with you all in the hopes that you can help me help Tyler and his son Lewis who no longer has a Father.
I thank you all so much in advance for your votes and comments. I will be sending this article to Courtney as my letter for Lewis along with any funds this post raises. Have a nice day everyone.
The one thing I want people to learn from this is: I never had a chance to say goodbye to my friend, so this post is almost my only chance to say it. I would do anything to spend just five more minutes with you bro just to say goodbye for now and I will see you later on the train to Heaven.