Well, certainly one can not force it onto people. But I believe all of the above have some merit to them.

By leaving society and starting over (say on an island), while you certainly have to deal with the external environment, you are not under direct control of any state. It sets an example people can look at, and compare to their current ways and whoever wants to join is welcome to do so. Eventually, it could take over the world.

If you play by the rules to gain support that is deemed legitimate by the existing system, you can also implement changes in small increments. For example, you could switch from representative democracy to direct democracy. It would encourage people to think for themselves, teach them that they are in control of their own lives and anyone could step up to bring about the change they want to see. You could then move from compulsory taxes to voluntary support of worthy initiatives. And so on. Eventually, people would realize there's no need for state.