Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.

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(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard Hersel.)

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Richard Hersel

FRIED RICE

Mr Chan was a careful man,
Said he, “I’ll win, or my name’s not Lee Han Chan!”
He was running in U.S Politics, that sort of fray.
He knew he’d be battered, day after day!
Yes, he was running for Congress, the politics of hate.
He started his campaigning early, didn’t want to be late.
What was his platform, his political angle?
He wanted the rich, to the poor, to dangle,
Yes, dangle the prospect of higher pay,
Particularly the Asian minority, to have a greater say.
Of course, such a mission would be a popular winner.
Couldn’t go wrong, even for a beginner.
Encourage Big Business, to up the ante,
Particularly for those with charming eyes, so slanty.
Yes, in his electorate, the Asian minority, had far from the best deal.
This was just a plain fact, with not much more to reveal.
Mr Chan would challenge the corrosive politics of hate,
He would encourage change not to be late,
Viewing change, for the better, for something was screwy.
In the admix of that political Chop Suey.
His fellow candidate for Congress, hung,
On his every word, namely Hu Flung Dung.

Came the election and Chan and Dung prospered,
Being elected in landslides, they were hot-spurred,
To becoming freshmen in Congress,
Trying to fix up a big fat mess!
“We’ll join forces to vote against others so dumb.”
“They won’t know what hit them, Dim Sum,”
“When we have finished, we will regroup,”
“And our opponents will be in the long and short soup!”
“Victory will be ever so nice,”
“Seeing them squirm in that sticky rice!”