'' ' I'm the king of Salem,' the old man
had said.
'Why would a king be talking with a
shepherd?' the boy asked, awed and embarrassed.
' For several reasons. But let's say that
the most important is that you have succeeded
in discovering your destiny.'
The boy didn't know what a persons 'destiny'
was.
' It's what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, when
they are young, knows what their destiny is. At that point in their lives
everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to
dream, and yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them
in their lives. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince
them that it will be impossible for them to realize their destiny.'
[...]
' It is a force that appears to be negative, but actually shows you how to
realize your destiny.[...]' ''
~The Alchemist; Paulo Coelho (page 22)
I recently read the fable ''The Alchemist'' written by Paulo Coelho and was really inspired by the way the author described what it means to follow your dream. For me it also means how to be happy and content with your life. I feel like the most people in my age don't know where to go with their lives even though nowadays we have endless possibilities to choose from. Often those people end up in a job they don't really like and complain about a lot of things they need to deal with on a daily basis. When I was younger I was always wondering why so many grown ups had a job they were obviously not happy with but still didn't change anything for the better. As a child I knew what things I liked to do and it was a mystery ro me why you should do somethimg everyday which you don't even like doing. At the same time I also knew that I found (and still find) our planet absolutely beautiful. I admired the flowers, trees, clouds, stars, sun, moon, wind, rain and life itself. I was awestruck by how there was such a diversity of life in nature and how something like the universe did even exist. And I also was deadsure that if such wonderful things were able to exist, I could do whatever I want to do and I didn't need to think about if something is possible or not. The only thing I needed to figure out was how I would accomplish whatever it was I wanted to do. As much as I admired life and the beauty of the world we live in I slowly began to see more evil in this world as I got older. And I quickly realized the most evil thing on earth were us, humans. I couldn't and still can't understand how humans can create so man wonderful things and at the same time so many bad things. People write the most amazing books, whole worlds that want to be discovered on hundreds of pages and when you read them you forget everything else in life; you get soaked up in a story that isn't yours and when you finish it you have to relearn how to live your own life. Music, that can transform the most grey winter days into something as colorful as the rainbow. And people helping each other where they can, laughing, hugging, singing, dancing, kissing and loving each other in so many different ways.
But then, at the same time we destroy our earth, our planet, our home, every day a little bit more. I watched so many documentaries as a child about what we humans do to this beatiful planet that I slowly began to see the bad everywhere. Plastic, that lasts for decades
over decades everywhere in rivers, oceans, forests and the streets; Cars and factories which pollute our air every second we live; killing millions of animals world wide every day just so everyone can buy as much meat as they wish; overfishing the oceans and through that destroying coral reefs so that more and more dead zones appear in the water. And because of that I knew that I want to save this planet from the complete destruction through humans. This is not only our planet, we share this earth with millions of other species whose home we also destroy.
Because I saw life like that I thought I knew what my dream, maybe my so called destiny was. I knew what I wanted to do with my life.
What I have learned from my friends and familiy was that everyone had some dreams and goals like that but as we grow older doubts come in and it seems like many people just stop believing that they will ever live their dream life. They end up in a place they don't want to be in and just arrange themselves with the circumstances. The main thing in their lives are worries and complains; worries about not having enough money, being not good enough, complaining about other people, about their exhausting and boring jobs and so on.
What is it that holds us back from following our dreams and doing something we truly enjoy?
Is it that we chose the wrong path or is it that we have the wrong expectations or even something else?
Like for example knowing that where you are going with your life is not where you truly want to go but you are afraid of changing something. Maybe the pure thought of change and uncertainty is what holds someone back of make a change for better or worse.
But is there really a positive or negative change or is it how we handle the change?
What came to my mind while reading ''The Alchemist'' was that it is not your life or whatever that makes you unhappy or depressed, it is yourself that turns a situation into either a good or a bad one. If someone is constantly turning everything he is experiencing into a bad thing, this person will percieve his life as depressing and he won't be able to be truly happy.
What I try to say is in my opinion it is possible for everyone to be happy with their lives. Everyone can transform their ''exhausting'' job or maybe even their life into something that is worth waking up for every single day. I was for many years in a place where I asked myself why I should wake up and go to school every morning and thought life itself was a burden I wouldn't be able to carry on for a longer time. Numbing myself with things like alcohol on the weekend was bringing some kind of artificial happiness for a short period of time. The years passed by while I couldn't even remember what I did in the last two weeks. But those years that passed by didn't happen in my mind. I did exist but I certainly did not live. I feel like many other people share a similar problem but not many talk about it. In my case I had enough of this horrible existence of mine at some point. Luckily I saw two ways out instead of only one; either I could have killed myself at the young age of 17 or I needed to work on my outlook on life. It is kind of obvious what I chose because I am here writing this post. But don't get me wrong I was struggling a LOT to get out of this place and I still am not completely back in my life. But I work on this every day, with every thought and every breath I take.
What I figured out, for myself at least, is that it is not the circumstances which are the cause of unhappiness or depression, it is your own state of mind. The difference is what thoughts you focus on and how you handle what life throws at you. In my opinion there are always multiple ways to look at a situation and if you can't think of a positive or at least a not negative thing you can learn from certain circumstance you need to search further. Otherwise this negative outlook will add up to other negative thoughts and feelings everyone collects over a lifetime until you drown in those thoughts.
I think to be happy you need to do what you love but at the same time you need to love what you are doing. There is no way you can live a life without any more or less negative impacts from outside, at least in my opinion. But if you love what you are doing so much that those negative things are not strong enough to make an impact on your mood or your motivation to achieve your goals and go after your dreams those things only help you to grow as a person. Find joy in little things in life and trust me, if you learn to see them, there are so many things to be grateful for. In general gratefulness is a big part of my life by now. I am grateful to experience life itself as a human being but at the same time I see the beauty in small things everyday. Maybe it is something like seeing the first blossoms in spring or the sun on your skin, your favourite song on the radio or the nice lunch you had with friends; there are endless things to be happy about but these things need to be truly appreciated to bring happiness.
In the beginning I had to force myself to even think one positive thought a day instead of constantly destroying myself. It was a bit like the 'fake it till you make' kind of way to get out of my depression but it worked out for me. You could say I programmed my own brain into thinking more positively. It is my attidude towards the things that happen in my life that changed completely and as cliché as it sounds, I am 100 % sure that everyone can create their own reality.
So in the end following your dream and happiness go hand in hand in my opinion. The first step to get out of depression is of course to get your will to live back and with that the motivation to work on yourself. That is the hardest step to take I think but it is possible. For me it was that I started seeing some beautiful things again, first and before all it was (paino) music that safed me. There is this guy on YouTube who creates the most amazing sounds in my opinion and there was a little voice in my head that whispered:''This looks fun, I want to be able to do the same thing and feel how much fun it is to play!''. So for the first time in years I started to listen again to my real voice in my head and not that destructive one that I trusted for a long time to tell the truth about me and my life. Since then I was almost constantly listening to his music and starting to play the piano again with a goal in mind. With that I rediscovered my love for creating things and I began to draw again. Instead of showing the world a happy mask of myself I increasingly was able to show my real happy face. Slowly I was able to take my life in a different direction while my life itself didn't change at all. It was just my thoughts that changed and with that my reality changed as well.
I hope this long ass of a post can help someone to maybe change their outlook on their life and make it a little bit better. I was struggling a lot to get the words I really wanted to say down and I still didn't really got everything done. But well since it is my first regular post I am sure I will get better from time to time to don't ramble that much.
If you are someone who is struggling with some kind of depression you should remember that you are not alone with your problems and that there is a way out. It won't be easy and it won't happen in a few weeks. You don't fall into a severe depression in a short period of time and that's why there is no shortcut out of this dark and grey world you are living in right now. But trust me when I say the colors and feelings come back, keep struggling and going forward so at some point you will notice more and more small changes in your daily life.
I would love to hear your opinions on the topic how to become a happier person and what kind of things you learned up until now in your life. I haven't really talked much about that topic in real life and I have almost only my point of view on it so it would be nice to get some new input. Being happy and doing what I really want to do is something I strive to achieve and I think learning from each others experiences is a great way to start with that!
I am also always open for some constructive criticism since I want to get better at writing in an entertaining way!
Thanks a lot for taking some time out of your day and reading until down here, I hope it was worth it :D !
PS: I really suggest to read ''The Alchemist'' if your interested in that kind of stuff. It's a great book in my opinion! :)