I am still waiting for my coronavirus test results but because of my level of exposure, I will likely remain out of work for at least fourteen days. I'm not here to talk about my Rona though. I don't really have a plan for this post though. Do I need one? It seems like having one would be a good idea but sometimes I find gems in my rambling.
As a painfully essential worker, I got called a hero a few times over the last several months. That type of thing sounds like it would be nice but it always rang hollow. It usually went like this: "You're heroes and the public owes an immeasurable debt of gratitude to you all. Now, shut up and get back to work." We slave on through what may be the apocalypse or an unbelievably overblown cold (depending on who you ask) because we need the paycheck as desperately as always and Amazon, and Walmart, and Target make billions off of our overworked, heroic backs. Those bastards didn't even have the decency to provide us with a cape or spandex costume as a badge of our new titles. Needless to say, I feel cheated.
When I express these feelings, people sometimes say something like this: "Well, at least you still have a job." They are not wrong. I can't complain about my stability but I have always found the "it could be worse" argument to be uncompelling because it is almost always true. It doesn't matter how bad a given situation is, there is usually something that could make it more horrific and I don't believe that this fact should be used to silence or diminish a person's complaint. Imagine how psychotically callus that line of reasoning can sound if we apply it to an extreme situation: "Yeah I'm really sorry someone touched your butthole but its not like he set you on fire or something so just quit your bitching and go to school."
Is it just me or does it feel extra dystopian out there lately? All it took was a little threat. You can look back on my old writings I have always maintained that our desire for safety is one of our greatest liabilities and it seems to be the systems of authority new favorite target.
Sure, safety sounds splendid. We all would absolutely, motherfucking positively love to be safe from all the scary things out there in the world, right? Am I right? If we just wear our masks, and hide in our houses, and eat our canned soup, and give away our guns or horde our guns, and stop questioning what the government says, and listen to CNN or Biden or Trump or whichever would-be savior we decide to bet the farm on, we will be shielded from all the dirty germs that are out there waiting to infect the unrighteous! My brothers, let me hear you say WASH YOUR HANDS! Go now and be cleansed of all your sinful freedoms and immoral humanity for the Rona forever seeks to corrupts those who ignore our righteous commandments. Amen!
It's all a bunch of horse shit though. We have forgotten (or didn't bother to learn) that we were never safe. A rock could fall out of the sky and kill us all, other diseases have devastated our species in the past, we kill each other by the thousands and millions fucking constantly. Covid might be scary but I don't know if it rises to this "lets all crawl into our bunkers" level of panic and the fact that it is presented as such worries the hell out of me. Safety is an illusion that we conjure up so that we don't lie awake at night thinking about all the things that want to kill us at any given moment and those who would seek to exploit us, rob us of our wealth, or gain our consent in their lustful grabs for power are using that unpleasant truth against us.
I kind of feel like I am in a dark mood. Maybe it is this recent isolation. I thought I wanted some significant amount of time off but it has only been a few days and I don't know what to do with myself. I'll leave off here for now and return later with a post about psychedelics or something.
Peace.
P.S.
I stopped writing about a year ago when we were all still using Steemit. This site seems to function pretty similarly but a lot of stuff is new. I would appreciate anyone who gives me a quick run down of how things work around here. What are these communities? How does one join them / post in them? Anything would greatly help.
Thank You.
All the images in this post are sourced from the free image website unsplash.com.