We've all got our own insecurities.. May it be our weight, or how our lips are so thin, or how we're flat chested or maybe it's as simple as how tall or short we are. But my biggest insecurity is *drum rolls* MY FRICKIN PIMPLES! Yes, you heard me right. I am so annoyed and insecure with the pimples that are inhabiting on my face, my face is like a breeding ground for pimples cause they sure do multiply so quickly. There is not a day that I wouldn't get annoyed when I'll look at my face on the mirror, cause my pimple infested face would be looking right back at me.
My face wasn't this pimply before, I actually had a flawless face before puberty hit me. Chaos reigned on my face when I hit puberty stage.
I was so hopeless and desperate to clear up my face but it seems like nothing else was ever gonna work.
I even joked around with my friends and I told them that "I'm four/five seconds from using sand paper and bleach on my face cause these annoying things are just so clingy." Cause they would tell me, "Syd, your beautiful if your face wasn't that pimply. lol" yes, we're a bunch of savages that always hurt each others feelings lol
Then, I discovered the power of make up. My older sister is addicted to makeup and she's actually a pro at it. She has pimples on her face as well but when she puts on make up, ssomehow she conceals them pretty well and she enhances her beauty with make up.
THIS WAS WHEN I USED MY MOTHER'S MARIE FRANCE MAKE UP FOUNDATION AND CONCEALER AND A LITTLE BIT OF BLUSH.
So I started to learn how to apply make up by myself cause my sister wouldn't teach me how to put on makeup. I practiced with my mum's makeup before, it was Marie France and it was so not my shade lol. Then my mother bought me my first ever make up, it was San-San haha yes.. It's perfect for the Filipina skin, the tones are pretty much suitable for any Filipina skin. And I loved using it cause it'll make me look more tanned, I always achieved that caramel tone. Although the only thing I know to do is the "natural" makeup look and I'm contented with it, I'm simple and I hate everything that looks so extra. So, make up for me was just to cover my insecurities. I was hiding under the power of make up. I'd feel really insecure when I would go out of the house without any make up on. yes, I had social anxiety and makeup made me feel less anxious which gave me unauthentic confidence.
But the cons of putting on makeup is your pimples would surely multiply and in time, whenever I'd apply make up, I'll have small bumps on my face because of the growing pimple that are just so hard to conceal. Yep, I envied all the peepz that has flawless face like dang I wish I had a flawless face as well...
And the reason why I stopped putting on makeup was to practice being confident in my own skin, little by little the chains of insecurity was broken and I was free from social anxiety cause I did not care what the people around me will say anymore cause in this life, you could never please everyone that you'll meet. Plus I did this to give my skin a break, in hopes for my pimples to go away quickly. I noticed that my pimples got worse when I was consistently putting on make up but they're starting to clear up right now... Thank God!
Someday, when my face is all cleared up again... I'd love to apply on some makeup again! :)
THIS WAS SO LAST DECEMBER. I USED MAYBELLINE FIT ME FOUNDATION AND A LOT OF CONCEALER AND I FINISHED IT OFF WITH FIT ME POWDER. PLUS A DAB OF LIPSTICK. I'M FOND OF MAYBELLINE PRODUCTS AS WELL.
Confidence should be from within you, not on you. It's not real confidence when you'll start to cower after it's been washed off or wiped off with wet wipes. Be confident in your own skin. And you'll just glow with your own light from within. With or without makeup, you're beautiful.
That's all for today!
