Know how to listen
First thing first, Listening is the process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and/or nonverbal messages; hear something with thoughtful attention. For learn how to listen, we have to differentiate hear and listen. When you have ears, you can hear everything; but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you understand what you heard. In other hand, listening is a skill. So, we have to pay attention in what the other person is saying to learn how to listen.
The process of listening
Receiving: It refers to the response caused by sound waves stimulating the sensory receptors of the ear; it is physical response.
Understanding: It is the stage at which you learn what the speaker means-the thoughts and emotional tone.
Remembering: It is important listening process because it means that an individual has not only received and interpreted a message but has also added it to the mind's storage bank.Evaluating: It consists of judging the messages in some way. At times, you may try to evaluate the speaker’s underlying intentions or motives.
Responding: This stage requires that the receiver complete the process through verbal and/or nonverbal feedback; because the speaker has no other way to determine if a message has been received.
8 Steps to Effective Listening:
• Step 1 Face the speaker and maintain eye contact: this refers that while we are having a conversation with someone, we have to pay attention very closely; keeping the eye contact.
• Step 2 Be attentive, but relaxed: now that you've made eye contact, relax. You can look away now and carry on like a normal person. The important thing is to be attentive and be present.
• Step 3 Keep an open mind: listen without judging the other person or mentally criticizing the things she tells you.
• Step 4 Listen to the words and try to picture what the speaker is saying: allow your mind to create a mental model of the information being communicated.
• Step 5 don’t interrupt and don't impose your solutions: sometimes it is disrespectful and sends a variety of messages like: "What I have to say is more interesting, accurate or relevant."
• Step 6 Wait for the speaker to pause to ask clarifying questions: when you don't understand something, of course you should ask the speaker to explain it to you.
• Step 7 Ask questions only to ensure understanding
• Step 8 Give the speaker regular feedback: Show that you understand where the speaker is coming from by
reflecting the speaker's feelings.