The question was “How do I deal with regrets and failures?”
My answer is as follows:
By Accepting them.
We all fail in our lives, and we all have regrets. I can think of plenty of times in my life where I have felt the sting of failure as well as regret, but that is an intrinsic part of life.
Failure and regret bring us pain, and pain leads us to discomfort. Humans, by nature, don’t like discomfort. When we feel it, we are compelled almost by instinct to regain a state of comfort. In order to do that, we must make a change, and in order to change, we must grow.
By accepting this, you begin to see your failures and regrets differently.
You begin to understand that a failure, when learned from, isn’t actually a failure at all, but a lesson. And this is what makes you grow as a person.
Use your pain as a strength. We feel negative emotions for a reason, we feel shame and regret and fail for a reason. Negative emotions are to be used as tools of growth. In fact, they’re some of the most powerful tools for growth at our disposal when thought of this way.
It all begins with your perspective. When you come at your failure and regret from a space of unacceptance, you fail to see the lessons within your mistakes and, as a result, become bound to them and doomed to repeat them.
Change how you process and experience your regrets and failures and you will change how they impact you.
I originally answered this question on Quora. You can find me here.
Let me know if you guys like these short insights and I’ll be sure to do more in the future!