“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn't try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn't need others' approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” ― Lao Tzu
THE PLACE CALLED ACCEPTANCE
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I have written a few posts about judgement, self-love, honesty and the like since I started blogging and whilst the topics, headings and content have varied, the underlying theme has been pretty consistent throughout… ACCEPTANCE! I will share a few of those links at the end of this post.
I would like to open the rest of this post with another quote...
one with carries a LOT of weight in my opinion,
and SHOULD be read and understood!
Here goes...
“I don't know if I continue, even today, always liking myself. But what I learned to do many years ago was to forgive myself. It is very important for every human being to forgive herself or himself because if you live, you will make mistakes- it is inevitable. But once you do and you see the mistake, then you forgive yourself and say, 'Well, if I'd known better I'd have done better,' that's all. So you say to people who you think you may have injured, 'I'm sorry,' and then you say to yourself, 'I'm sorry.' If we all hold on to the mistake, we can't see our own glory in the mirror because we have the mistake between our faces and the mirror; we can't see what we're capable of being. You can ask forgiveness of others, but in the end the real forgiveness is in one's own self. I think that young men and women are so caught by the way they see themselves. Now mind you. When a larger society sees them as unattractive, as threats, as too black or too white or too poor or too fat or too thin or too sexual or too asexual, that's rough. But you can overcome that. The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself. If we don't have that we never grow, we never learn, and sure as hell we should never teach.” ― Maya Angelou
I don’t know if it is simply time, age and maturity that have brought about this change within me, or if it was the recent removal of stress in my life, but quite simply put – I am feeling VERY comfortable in my own skin – and DAMN, it feels good!
Insecurity, seeking constant approval and the looming judgement of others is something I have long since lived with, but I noticed a significant change in myself in the last year… so perhaps it was the compounding stress more than the above, that caused that change in my perspective on people and things… because this last year was probably THE most stressful year I have EVER made it through. I have spent the last 365 days walking around feeling like a volcanic explosion about to erupt – and before you all get happy here, I am NOT referring to any GOOD kind of explosion lol!
My patience levels were exhausted, my emotions were running high, my temper even higher and I simply had NO more tolerance for, well – ANYTHING or ANYONE that pushed me, tested me, shoved me, squashed me or made me tweak even just a little! Lol - (oh the joys of stress haha). I have spent many years, worrying about EVERYTHING… not only personally, but business related too and I just reached a point of actually NOT CARING ABOUT ANY OF IT!
There was simply nothing left within me to care anymore… nothing… not even the teeniest, tiniest grains worth. I was DONE! Finished! – I SNAPPED!
It is quite mind-blowing what an internal surrender like that can do for a person… because not unlike a previous life changing event in my past, I woke up recently and said FNCK IT! – Something HAS to give, because if it doesn’t, I am going to die slowly from the inside out trying to please everyone else except myself – and just like that, I let it all go.
WHO CARES what anybody else thinks about me and my choices in life. It is MY life, not theirs… And for the first time in 37 years I can HONESTLY and UNEQUIVOCALLY say that I am HAPPY with me and where I am right now! – No matter what ANYONE else has to say about it. Perhaps I will develop a beer belly (ok, ok, I don’t actually drink beer lol), perhaps I will stop wearing make-up (ooooh now there’s a shocker for anyone that knows me well lol) I may not cake myself with make-up but you would NEVER see me leave the house without it! Irrelevant – the point being, ACCEPTANCE!
I have reached a point of acceptance in my life. Acceptance of my SELF - Acceptance of my efforts and roads travelled thus far - Acceptance of my physicality - Acceptance of my character - Acceptance of my choices and last but not least, Acceptance that I am perfectly imperfect and I deserve to be loved no matter WHAT!
And I think it actually had a LOT to do with walking away from my business. As emotional as that was, I TRULY believe it was the best thing I ever could have done for myself and if this is how I feel about it after only one month, I am SERIOUSLY looking forward to the years ahead! Lol
In essence, what I am saying here is that each and every one of us donate SO much of ourselves to worry. We worry about EVERYTHING and for what?! What and where does that get us in the grand scheme of things? NOWHERE - it gets us nowhere!
I do realise that circumstance plays a large role in how MANY of us live our lives, right down to the social circles kept, jobs held etc. but if you are not happy with yourself within that sphere then you absolutely HAVE to get out – no matter HOW impossible that may seem! Because if you don’t, then essentially… it means that you are ignoring your “true self” – you are disregarding YOU! Going against what you desire within… and how can you be happy or develop an acceptance of things if you are ignoring every road sign along the way?!
It has taken me 17 years to get here… but I arrived and that is ALL that matters!
Where there is a WILL, there is a WAY – ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!
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PREVIOUS POSTS
To outline a little of the things I have covered previously, I will share a few of the links to previous posts… and AGAIN, I say – these posts have LONG since passed their curation period, so there really is no benefit to me sharing them with you other than what lies within the paragraphs themselves…
JUDGEMENT and the MASK!
EXPRESSION - Let it ALL HANG OUT!
UNAPOLOGETICALLY ME!
Learning to Love - YOU!
So... I hope that all of this rambling,
offers a little bit of food for thought ;)
Onward and upward in the direction of
ALL our DREAMS and to the place called
ACCEPTANCE!
Until next time...
Much Love from Cape Town, South Africa xxx
