this is really strange ...
i feel like I have been motivated for so long by this inner frustration and a lack of self worth
like I had to accomplish something in order to feel good about myself
I have been doing a lot of meditating on this recently, trying to accept my self for who I am and feel worthy without having to accomplish anything ...
well ...
I guess it worked!
I don't have this chip on my shoulder anymore
I am scared that I will lose my ambition without this fire
what will fuel my actions
where will my drive come from??
well ...
today I felt this desire to create I just wanted to make things
I understand this a bit more clearly now
We all want to create
we all have this desire
but often our true desires are hidden by "attempts" to cajole fear / pain
without this pain, this fear of not being worthy, my true intentions and desires have the space to creep through
lets see where we go ??
yeahhhh