is interesting to take a step back to understand way am doing or not doing the work to get a job.
or making friends or interaction a have had 14 bad days here so.
so noting has happen in the matter a feel different to day progress is happening.
a just came back from the services office got my social security nr to day. this is grate news.
if am following my list a do not Ned to go the the Dr. photo pixabay
been tinkling on way a do not work harder to get a job over here.
like a have done minimal work on the matter. am think is a combination of my old work back home is was so bad fore so many years wit my old boss ho betray me, and just ghosts from my past.
my kid in me believe its going to be the same now so hi is just saying no.
This is the same part of me ho was trapped in a impossible situation when a was a kid.
now it just a defense that hides me from danger but the danger is not real
so here is where The list is coming in. if am not following the list am going to fail.
This old emotions in me are so strong. so half my work most be to try to get me out of freeze
so a can continue my big plan and not get trapped in old stuff.
so the list is getting bigger not by specific tidings but of techniques
to get me out of freeze.
so adding.
the hooooowww sound its a breathe exercises
whit a sound "thinking of a ship coming into a dock in the fog"
and using the horn
on out breath 3 times then one no sound. its helping to comedown
sometimes if its much going on.
The brain its losing focus and to get u back to the
real world u Ned to help.
see around where u are say 5 object u see: lamp, Apple, back pack , bike helmet and bananas.
then 5 sounds: the clothes dryer, the air fan, waking from upstairs ,water in pipes and the music on my computer.
and 5 feelings: cold on my neck, stiff neck, a can feel my thigh against the chair , my stomach sounds, tingling on my face.
maybe do it 2-3 times if u are drifting out in something just do it
The color blue.
see the room the road after blue object street sings cars etc.
its the same as the 5 things but easier to do. get you to and be present
The new updated list
- 1. my breathe exercises 5 min every day. almost
- 2. 5 object, sounds, feelings
- 4. The wooooohoooo...
- 5. The color blue
- 6. T.R.E "Tension and Trauma Release" 3 times a week. 10 min
- 7. in the weekend and next week wash my apartment in progress 20% done
8. Monday get my social security nrdone :)- 9.bike riding 2 times a week. and always go out of the flat one time a day if its just fore 5 min
- 10. submit applications to work at this moment is do not matter where it is but i have to have a reason to get out of my flat and a way to meet human beings. and as a bonus get money out of it.
- 11. bonus. move flat this is not on my current list but something am thinking on a Ned a job before a can.