Continuing from: The Mind, the Body and the Being
Reading into the nature of my Mind, the thinking that pops up has been quite the fascinating process. It's interesting to see that my thinking is a reflection of my accepted and allowed nature. And what has been challenging in moments has been the process of actually going deeper into the points that emerge. See, the dark deep seated points are not so pretty. Initially, for a long time...my process of living was a form of coping so to speak...as just kind of burying anything that I didn't really want to give attention/focus to that popped up within me. To an extent there is some validity in being able to let go of what comes up in mind...but at the same time, and this where I am challenging myself to be more and more precise: is to in fact make note of the various bits of info that come up within me, seemingly out of nowhere.
How do I go about this process? It starts with identifying the movement within me in connection to a thought or a series of thoughts. And from here going into the specifics of the emotion/feeling that is connected to the thinking. Sometimes this is in relation to others or particular things...and this is where it gets interesting, as what I've found rather consistently is that these"points" about others and things...as like this stuff separate from me, is not in fact actually so. It's revealing of bits and pieces of my overall nature that have been kind of hardwired inside...and it's fascinating really....because it's not like this is the totality of who I am...or that who I really am is this in fact per se...but it's the limited version of me as "what I've accepted and allowed thus far." To kind of sum things up another way - is, "checks and balances" - where it's a process of equality and oneness where the bits of "self-narration" that pop up within me are my points of "investigation". The more I allow myself to explore this through writing....the deeper I get into self-reflection. From here I make self-forgiveness a piece of gift giving.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist sharing and speaking about the process of self-investigation.
I realize it's a sensitive subject as the nature of self-investigation is very vulnerable in nature and it's a going into our mind consciousness limitations in and as various frames of mind...where essentially we've created forms of separation as dissonance in our psychology.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being insensitive to myself and others in communication.
I realize that words are structured sounds that shape ourselves here as the world. I realize this is not an airy fairy magic like thing. It's not a hocus pocus just say the spells you want to cast kind of thing...but it's about being real and directing ourselves in the best of ways. And what's interesting about this process is that perhaps the most positive things a person can do is get in tune with everything that is in fact not positive...not so cool. It is this stuff here that is like getting into the real depth of our overall character here.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted talking or sharing about the character impressions of myself that are less than flattering, less than desirable.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the psychology of my own mind to the extent where it's like I wouldn't really want to spend too much time going into points of myself that are inferior or inadequate. I realize it's in these bits and pieces of myself as these points of suppression where I can actually really really help myself...and thus potentially assist and support others. I realize the energetic reactions are specific math in relation to the points that are emerging and that as I allow myself to be my own scientist that documents and records the specifics of the moments - I gift myself writing material to in a way put quite simply -write myself rite. Meaning to stand one and equal with all of myself here.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to avoid using the phrasing "one and equal"
...and for having justified this as too much for most people to handle. I realize that this is more revealing about myself and the fact that I've accepted and allowed myself to place too much concern into the judgements and or opinions of others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the mind fuck of being overly concerned about the opinions of others. I realize it's not ever so much about others opinions....but in fact about my own opinions that I've held onto and in fact in some ways have kept guarded and even held close as my 'matters of fact' when in all actuality, this has just been a point of of comfort in shaping the base model narrative of my overall thinking. I realize - I'm not here to merely survive and cope and just get by. I realize it's a process of continuous refinement day my day as my word and world play working here. It's like I am my own composer and it's a matter of my self-honesty in doing my accounting effectively from moment to moment - because I am directing as the maestro here and the writer and the singer and while expressing myself as the totality of the orchestra as yes there's much happening here together as one.
I commit myself to going deep into the points that are uncomfortable within myself.
I realize it's the only way for me to work through the deep seated suppression that i've been historically quite good at hiding from myself. And i realize that it's not that i deliberately want or wanted to hide aspects of myself from myself....but it's been more of a sort of a default reaction play out...and it's time to make such corrections and adjustments one and for all. I realize as I walk a point within my mind/body/being here that is challenging - I am in turn assisting and supporting others to bootstrap the process because I create authority on the point in question and thus stand as a point of support and assistance for others...also showcasing that needs deep dark bits that mostly get dismissed can in fact be sorted out effectively and efficiently.
I commit myself to working on my efficiency and effectiveness in communication to share my stories of investigation in a way that's easily digestible. I commit myself to work on my writing style and presentation as a process of fine-tuning as my crafting expression of my life process journey here. I realize this is the real adventure of life - to actually go deep inside ourselves here to investigate all aspects of ourselves here and to utilize all that we have here to share in communication the connections and lessons that we learn. I realize it's one of the most awesome things when I am able to accelerate and expand the learning process here. We are all teachers and students of Life. All Life matters.
It's important to Communicate. This is key in the creation of our utmost potential. A “RE'STEEM'” is much Appreciated. Thanks. Grateful to Be Here!
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