A Long-Deserved Break
Have you forgotten about me? Well, I can tell you this: I'm never going away. I, Stratched Scratchford Earnstein am here to stay, for I believe in the practice of being consistent in everything that you do, because that is what success will come from at the end of the day. You have 24 hours, and you can use some of the hours within the confines of those 24, big, juicy hours to cultivate a firmer state of personal consistency in the form of repetitive actions in regards to what you do. What do you do?
(I didn't know keys could have names. This is a bit creepy if you ask me. Image)
Give, and You Shall Receive
Even though everybody is struggling at our facilities at Huggson E. Inc, it is of little interest to our workers to give up. We fight strange West Mongolian animals most of the time, but most of all we fight our own urges to lie down and die from a lack of wanting to push on. Yes, this can be the periodic state of any man, so it is of no mystery to me, S.S. Earnstein, why our workers at times feel like screeching intensely at the sheer thought that it might take another 5 years to climb their own individual ladder of personal success, and I could not empathize more. This is why I approach emotional breakdowns with compassion, no matter how fat the lady that serves is, and despite the five layers of fat it takes to peel off a person in our massage section to see who you're talking to. Yes, I have much compassion, because I am a businessman of utter most emotional connectivity, unlike other business men like Donald Draper whose sole purpose has been to dissociate from his true self and disconnect from his fellow man. There are many examples of bad men in business, but I am not one of those guys, and for that I am truly happy, even if that means I'm sometimes forced to hug our dripping-with-sweat cleaning lady whose bodily condition seems to be some personal rain-forest, condemned with some foul waterfall of odor-ridden moist coming out of every body wrinkle in her body. This I don't mind at all. After all, we are Huggson E. Inc.
(This is not our cleaning lady, and I don't wish she were, for it takes tears and sweat to work at Huggson E. Inc. She just doesn't have it from the looks of it. Image)
Lastly I want to say that I am utterly grateful to all of you here. I have no intention of leaving you short-handed, so I will stay, support, nurture, cultivate and help you, you and you! Yes! All of you! Because that's who I am.
- Earnstein
(Who's been a bad boy?! Yes, D. It's you who I am talking about! Image)