Half of the time we live in agony because we are afraid to see our doo-doo and we think that if we avoid it, it will go away, it will not be so.
If you accept your problem without repressing it, allow them to free themselves and let go of their fears, their prejudices, and their anxiety forever.
The biggest part of the pain you can feel when you separate are the voices in your head that tell you: you were wrong, your ex-acted badly and somehow caused a bad relationship to this mess.
When you hear these thoughts in your head, it is customary to focus on positive thoughts and get away from negative thoughts. However, it does not work with a break because you're so hurt and the pain is stronger than any positive thinking you can focus on.
You can always focus on the best future you want, but you will not be able to overcome the relationship if you escape the bad feelings in your body and your emotional brain.
These negative feelings must be felt, experienced and resolved.
Saying that you stop focusing on them and think of something else will not prevent them from repeating the cycle of negative thoughts and feelings.
Do not rely on yourself to get out of the chaos. You must use a higher power or connection to get yourself out of the way or talk about your habits, yourself and lack of love.
God has become a dirty word in our modern culture. This is because we are fed up with the religious version of God and the desperate search for a personal, loving and transforming version of a higher power.
Your emotional brain is destroyed if you have a toxic relationship.
You loved, you hurt yourself and your emotional brain, your nervous system, and your body live in fear because you've built up your pain and you're like a wounded animal waiting for someone to hit.
If you have abandoned your relationship and still have that pain or anxiety or both are still entangled, then you will respond to that emotional brain.
The emotional brain is a thousand times stronger than any other part of your brain.
It is important to break the emotional brain with a power that is more powerful than that. And if you try to use your reasonable logical brain, it's not strong enough.
What has been shown to break the power of the emotional brain is a sense of love, comfort, security, and connection with something stronger than you. This sense of pure love that you can connect to and you can name anything that works for you: God, a greater conscience, a faith in a love that you know when you were young with a loved one or a character you like in a movie or a story. It just has to be the best. Be a version of love that you can imagine and relate to.
All this makes you feel that you are connected to a love that is bigger than what you need to support your emotional brain so that you feel secure so you can unlock the negative cycle of pain and anxiety.
The most important way to unleash your past is to feel powerful, like a champion who worked hard and won a great reward.
The main reason most people avoid getting hurt in a relationship is that they are afraid of being a disaster or reaching out to others as if they can not control their feelings and themselves.
When you grow up and hurt yourself, nobody teaches you how to be ready to suffer, or not to be afraid of pain, or ask for forgiveness or look for someone to help you!
Most often the pain is ignored, pushed under the carpet and life goes on. In the meantime, your emotional brain remembers the pain and creates the feeling that enters your nervous system and emotional memory that relationships are not safe for you to express your emotions and that the damage is better avoided or ignored.
If you do not witness the way you love, feel, feel and experience that love in your body, you can not really experience the love you desire.