Wow man, that looks amazing. It's so hard living in a place where I can't get any. I honestly to need cannabis for Aspergers, a nerve disorder, and PTSD from childhood abuse. 22 synthetic prescriptions in the past few decades and nothing has come close to working and many have caused a lot of harm.

It's so insane to know what stops this mental and physical pain but there's no way for me to find it or afford it with disability that only covers the rent and electricity (I'm very grateful for disability, I just want off the 5 different pills I'm on that aren't helping and to be on cannabis alone).

I'm holding onto hope. A US Marine saw my situation and got me a bottle of cannabis oil full spectrum and I felt so normal I actually was able to go out in public by myself to a grocery store, the first time in over 5 years. I was also able to use the phone for that month. In about 10 years I've only used the phone those few times.

It's so much suffering and I feel like no one cares. I know many do care who fight for cannabis. But this stuff isn't recreational to me, it's really the only way I can get out of this bed.

I have hope things will change soon. The problem is even where it is legal medicaid won't cover it so I couldn't afford it anyway.

So I have to suffer mentally and physically, or risk being locked in a cage and losing my disability (750 a month for everything) and Medicaid which I need.

All I want to do is volunteer at a grow site and take care of the plants. I just can't lift heavy things but my arms are getting better than they were. I just hate being in this bed 23.5/7.

Hopefully I'll be able to grow it one day and get off all this crap. I'm tired of being a lab rat for their profit.