“Actions speak louder than words.”
It’s true they do.
One can say all these beautiful things but once the day comes to prove it, it’s all silence.
I wonder if he cares.
If he really fucking cares.
I remember I gave him a bear for Valentine’s.
It’s in the trash.
Just bash what I got you.
I am alone.
I don’t trust anyone around me. And those who say they’re my “friends” are not.
They laugh at my failure.
Oh well you live and learn.
I want all of this to turn.
Turn around where I can have you in my arms.
Believe me when I say “I love you .” But do you?
Here I go again not thinking about me but thinking about you.
But guess what y’all he made me shoo.
Don’t worry I got the memo.
I guess our love was a demo.
When things get harder those who were let me say “always” there they tend to leave.
And I begin to notice those all around me.
I have a mom who’s crazy as hell.
She only fucking uses me when they’re ringing the bell.
Fuck what I feel.
Did you know I buy my own fucking meals.
We got in a fight.
Wasn’t so bright. I cried and realized I’m alone.
That’s why I write my poems at night when no one is watching because I can hear myself think.
But no one has my back not even those who love me.
I’m a fucking joke no a menace to society.
I’m getting depressed again. Shit am I in the ‘Catcher in the Rye.’
He doesn’t listen. I don’t know if he cares.
I got friends who are blabber mouths.
You’re the only one who cares.
Wait do you?
No one cares. I’ll write even if no one reads this, this is my therapy better than self harm.
I remember when he said “you have suicidal thoughts like everyday.”
Actually not true I passed that. I’m over it and I’m happy I don’t self harm anymore.
I don’t think about killing myself. I am depressed though but no I don’t want to die.
That’s not a lie.
I want to be happy but right now I’m in pain and I have to let you go in order for me to be me again.
I’m sorry I love you. You were the one.
But that was so long ago.
Wish you the best you showed me your true colors I’m sorry I have to go, I’m going to bed.