Grief After Death. Loosing Your Spouse.
This segment is about accepting the death of your loved one and acknowledging the end of your role as a life time companion. . Grieving a loved one's death can be a complicated and confusing process and it takes time to recover physically mentally and emotionally.Again, I strongly encourage you to get involved in a grief support group. You may not be ready right away, and it might take a few weeks or even a few months for you to find the right group. So in the meantime, you may want to acknowledge your loved one's passing and the change in your life with your own private ceremony after the funeral.
We're all accustomed to ceremonies celebrating happy events such as weddings and baptisms. Graduations, anniversary and birthday. Celebrations mark significant milestones in our lives.
Funerals mark the passing of a life. But think about taking one more step and finding a meaningful and personal way to acknowledge the loss of your loved one and to mark the end of your role as a hudband/wife it will help with the healing process.
Perhaps you like the tradition of taking flowers to the grave. If faith was an important part of your loved one's life, honor their memory by respecting his or her tradition. If your belief system isn't the same, have a different ceremony that will bring you comfort.
Some people like to plant a memory garden. You could make a donation to their favorite charity, or to your favorite charity in their name.
And then, think about burning any old grudges and hurts. A friend of
mine once invited me to a summer get toguether. I asked what I could bring. She said, "Bring something to eat, something to drink, and something to burn." I laughed at that, and I said, "Now, what would I bring to burn?" and she said, "Oh, any old grudge, resentment,or guilt that's been hanging around too long that you'd like to get rid of," and I thought, "What an interesting idea!"
There was an incident that had bothered me for a long time, and every time I thought of it, my feelings were as intense and as painful as the day it happened. So I wrote the experience down as I remembered it, including all of my feelings about it. I put that in an envelope, and then that night, when I tossed it into the fire, I watched the flames envelop it and turn it into ash. And an amazing thing happened. I let go of the pain. I still remember the incident, but it no longer hurts me.
So when you can reach the point when you're ready to let go of mistakes that you made; when you can forgive others for what they did or didn't do; Then, you can say goodbye to a lot of pain and you can begin the process of moving on.
And then, when you're ready, see if there is a grief counseling program in your area. They are also offered by Hospitals and Churches. They have helped tens of thousands people make sense of the grief processes and help you go through it.
You will identify with other people's experiences, and when you share your story, I'm sure that you will discover that you have been stronger. You have been smarter. You have been braver. And you have given more than anyone could have ever asked for or expected. And even in the moments when you felt Isolated, frightened, alone, and boxed in, something miraculous starting to happen/
You were growing, mentally and spiritually. It will take some time, but at some point, when you look back on your role as husband/wife, you will realize that it hurt. It was hard. And there were situations that you did not handle perfectly. But realize that you did the best you could.
Be gentle with yourself, and acknowledge that doing your best is all we can ever ask of ourselves, or of others, and hopefully, at that point, you will feel like you can release your gtief, and step into a new and a different role. You will always remember the person you shared your life with, and when you do, it will probably be with a mixture of laughter and tears.
You have been a husband/wife. It's an elite group of courageous,patient and tolerant
people that deserve the honor and respect of all who know you.
The next chapter in your life is up to you.I hope you will make a commitment to
caring for yourself so you will have the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual strength you're going to need as a single man/woman.
And when you're ready, and it's time to move on, that you will have the will and the ability to create a new world for yourself. This world will be different. It will take some adjustment, but eventually, you will grow into this new life, and hopefully, you will find peace and comfort in knowing that you have performed one of the most noble acts any person will ever do for another. Being there for him/her.
I lost my husband suddenly two and a half years ago. I think about him every day. But with my support group I have come a long way....
Hopefully this will help someone facing this difficult time.... It will get better...
Posted from my blog with SteemPress : https://www.onlinenewlifestyle.com/2020/02/24/grief-after-death-loosing-your-spouse/