92 m i n u t s.
I once thought that if I ended up with X character of my story, our life would be the same as a film that he himself commented some time ago:"the day we finish will be the same..." That time I didn't pay attention to it, but I understood the plot a little, the circumstances were the same and I saw it again, from the beginning....
That time when the film ended, I began to relate characters, lifestyle, situations, everything was very similar to me... almost so familiar. There were 4 characters, they were friends, they were friends, they were couples. In the course of time the story changed and for a moment I thought I was the secondary character, since the other couple-friends ended their relationship a little earlier.
It's strange to feel the same way Celeste felt, what she experienced because I feel the same way. The medium in which he develops is similar - I'm still studying -, he even has a gay friend... he's still his own... The end of the film... I hope it's not like that.
Time went by and I forgot about the movie... Things were fine.
They were. They were. It's over now.
About 4 months passed, and I remembered that feeling I only heard in my mind.
I had to get that damn movie out of my head.
I searched for her and I played... I know what's coming.
And I saw us, it's us, it was us. Doing this nonsense, the same "x" minute nonsense... You're with someone else... I follow my life.
You may read it in a moment as if you were sorry, but it's a pity I don't have.
Because I feel nothing. I haven't felt anything for a long time... I feel nothing today...
As I once said, or let you know... that love with time, it was gone, there was nothing left of it... it withered with the passing of days, one of us had to react, and I had to be the villain.
The minutes go on, and I think... Am I right?
Did I become a movie character? How ridiculous I hear myself... how ridiculous I read myself.
It's part of the process, I tell myself. Perhaps it is a portrait of what is happening now, but in a slower way because let's make it clear that this is not a film that lasts x number of minutes, this is real life, it's my reality.
If meeting someone takes time, well, I do.
But what I don't have, is the desire to waste time with people who are not clear about their film, if I have to meet someone who is at that stage where things are clear, and knows which way to go...
Although I'm not desperate because... I have that desire to be free and be me, I want to fall in love again with the person that I was a long time ago; the one who painted on the canvas and who wanted to stain the clothes I wore, nothing mattered to him.
The one who went out no matter what time or day, the one who loved to read poetry and philosophy, the one who... the one who tried to remember what he was like.
Fin-
Sometimes I think... no, not sometimes because I know that decision was the best I could do for both of us. We needed to grow, in fact we still lacked for... and it was so many years that in the end all those plans that at first were heard and dreamed of a beautiful way, from one moment to the other were vanishing and only seemed extracts of nightmares which did not want that they were reality.
As always, let it flow and wish you well.
However, remember not to do what you don't want to be done...