Though we know that we love our kids and nothing is more important to us than our kids, we need a way to make them also feel that they are special to us. We need a way to transmit our feelings to them so that they'd never feel alone. But the question is, how we can do that?
There has been enough discussion on this topic and people shared different ways to express your love to your children, and all of them make sense. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, knowing the love language of your children (i.e the love language that your children understand well) can be a difference maker in the value of relationships. I've sorted the list of those love languages based on their importance in my view.
1 - Physical Love:
We all know that nothing can beat physical love. Even words can't compare with physical love because your hugs will make him actually feel what you want to make him feel. Hugging is not the only thing that falls under Physical Love category. Other acts such as playing with your kid, giving him a kiss and tossing him round in the air fall under that category too.
You could choose to make the confession of your love through words too but if you're doing it at the expense of physical love, then you're not doing it right. Yes, words are important and in my view, it is the 2nd big language of love for children. That's also what Dr. Gary Chapman believes.
2 - Lovely Words:
I was reading the book of Dr. Gary Chapman and an article from iMom about its importance and well, it made me feel great that I used to think the same as Dr. Gary Chapman. In my recent article, I've talked about the importance of appreciation and mentioned there that appreciation is the basic need of every human.
It is likely that your kids will try to make you happy either with their innocent drawings or by giving you some kind of gift. You must appreciate their love and make them feel that you loved their gifts (and well, that's a fact, all of us love the gifts given by our kids).
Other than appreciation, you should communicate with your children in soft and lovely manners. Our neighbor used to shout at their children a lot and used to use abusive language. I couldn't believe how she can do that as I didn't expect to see such a mother in my life. But that led me to the fact that every human is different. Of course, all mothers love their children but some of them really fail to express the love in good manners (such as my neighbor). Words like "I love you" or "you mean everything to me" can make a lot of difference. Just try that!
3 - Sparing Your Time For Them:
The time you spend with your children is worth much more to them than the time you spend on work. Feel the difference; you work just to bring happiness to your children because you love them and when you spend your time with them, your purpose is exactly the same. There's one thing that you must understand and that's "Money can't buy everything".
No matter how tired you are, if you could spare just 10 minutes in a day, spend them with your children. Ask them the personal questions like what they did in school or which subject the teacher taught to them in school, then you're doing the right thing. Your children will appreciate your time and notice that you spent your time even when you were tired. And maybe that's the love language of your children?
The book "The 5 Love Languages of Children" by Dr. Gary Chapman is great enough because I've learned many new things from it. If you would like to grab one, then I'd say it worth the read.
References:
www.imom.com/love-language-the-5-love-languages-of-children/
https://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Children-Secret-Effectively-ebook/dp/B01BXPWGX4
Images: Public domain from Pixabay