On this special day set aside for honoring fathers, a little tongue-in-check I'd like to begin with stating the obvious. Without children, there would be no Father's Day ...
Well, yes, nicely done "Captain Obvious!" What's your point? Simply to draw our attention to the great value our children represent. Thankful to have them in my life, I am writing today in an attempt to inspire you to give that some careful thought.
Blessings of Life
Addressing this to those blessed to be fathers, what do you remember from the first moments of seeing your first child? Are words sufficient to express your memories?
I know for myself, they are not. Frankly, I had no business being a father, certainly at that time of my life. I wasn't "ready" for it. Whatever that means! (all these years later, I've learned you're never "ready," if that means knowing what to do and faithfully and consistently executing it well ...)
Nonetheless, there I was experiencing the miracle of birth. My wife and I chose to have our children via the Bradley method, i.e. completely free of any medication. What a wonder to see this little bundle drawing his first breath. Alert, looking around, taking in this new world they had just entered ... What a marvel!
While not ready, I instantly knew that my life had just permanently changed. Words simply fail, to me, to fully convey all that happens at that time in our lives. Over time, I've often thought of how best to express this transformation. Being sure there are far brighter "wordsmiths" out there who can do better than me, I've settled on believing simply they "deepen" our lives. Making our lives richer for the experience.
Ideally, we would all consider children to be blessings to us. Blessings of life. I know that is often not the case. The antonym of blessing is cursed. Think of a common expression used when talking about bringing children into the world. Delivered / delivery ... From what? Yes, we are well aware of the issue of the pains of childbirth, but we've been in many conversations where it's more like you have a disease when pregnant. Sad, given the great value our children represent.
Words of Encouragement
You may be reading this currently going through, or having gone through in the past, great difficulty with children. I would never think to gloss over the challenges they can represent to us at times. No question about it, we can be overwhelmed by it. We have been through our own periods of "trial and tribulation" of various sorts, but I would like to encourage you, if I can.
Don't give up. Keep "fighting the good fight." These "seasons of life" do generally come to an end. Children do grow up. They do learn, sometimes (like me) the "hard way, but they do tend to finally "figure it out." There can be and often are periods of time afterwards that we might not have dared believe possible. Where would we be and what would we have missed, if we had given up earlier?
Perhaps, if you've experienced this, for the benefit and encouragement of us all, you might feel led to give us an example in the comments.
The Future
Putting my "Captain Obvious" hat back on, what future do we have without children? We simply don't have one. It is the "natural order of things" that we reproduce and experience all that it means to raise up those who will carry on after we are gone.
On this special day, if you have found any value in this post at all, I would encourage you to just spend a little more reflective time than you might otherwise, to consider all that your children represent to you. To us. To the world.
!! WARNING !!
The remainder of this post is content specifically written for those of my fellow Steemians who consider themselves disciples of Jesus Christ, as I do. It is certainly not intended in any way to be disrespectful, let alone offensive. I am well aware, nonetheless, that it could be taken that way.
I trust this will be sufficient notice for those who would probably be best served by skipping the rest of this post. While, at the same time, preserving our community's freedom to express ourselves, as we may feel compelled to do ...
To my brothers and sisters in Christ, wherever this post may find you in reading it, I am writing as a man who has "been through the wars" over a long, full life. While my life certainly didn't start out in any way suggesting it, I am blessed to have a "quiver full" of children.
In obedience exercising the gifts our Lord has given me, what follows is word for word what I wrote recently to the leaders of our local church. For context, we were in the midst of a very powerful and moving series of sermons on being parents. I pray He will bestow the promise of Isaiah 55:8-11 on your reading of it.
Children: Blessings and Gifts of Life
My brothers,
Good morning. In obedience to what I have felt prompted to do for some time and as follow-up to a recent meeting I had with ****, I am writing to you all and making a humble appeal for you to consider what I believe the Lord has given me to say about the topic.
As a word of encouragement, let me first say, as I have shared with family and friends, that I found our recent sermon series on raising children to be the best I have heard on this vital topic. And I’ve heard a lot of them! As mentioned from the pulpit, along with I imagine many others, **** and I both only wished we’d heard them about 40 years ago … 😊
My leading this morning is to follow through in writing down words of exhortation, for your prayerful consideration. Specifically focused on the obvious – before you can talk about raising children, first you must have children to raise. And in response to definitely subtle, but nonetheless present, comments made at times in these sermons that I believe represent more of the how the world views children than how our Lord views children.
Strong words? No question. Offensive even? I certainly hope not to give any offense, my brothers. Who am I to be saying them? Well, that was the central theme of my requesting time to go over a little of this with **** and why I arguably, before the Lord, have been disobedient up until now in getting this written, instead of much closer to the time I was prompted.
So, children. Where do they come from? What do they represent? The answers?
To the first, I believe it is simply beyond debate, from His revelation of truth to us in His Word, that our Lord is the Author of life. And not in some sort of distant, casual way either. But, sovereignly, totally involved with the creation of each and every one of us. The world’s antithetical view? We are the authors of life. No, we are not!!
And the answer to the second? From His word, creations in His image! (can our natural minds fully absorb what that even means?) And, therefore, as a direct result, as stated in the subject line, from His word, they are blessings and gifts to us. So much could be covered here, but beyond my saying our properly “wrestling with” this answer heavily influences what is written below, that is not my primary leading in writing to you.
So, do we believe the answer to the first question? What do our words indicate, as an answer? What do our actions indicate, as an answer? Having “been through the wars,” for almost 30 years on this topic, I think I’ve heard just about every possible way to “dance around” answering these questions.
As has been said many times in the pulpit, over the years we’ve attended ****, “What is the Lord doing?” “How should we respond?” If we believe He is the sovereign author of Life and we say we are fully submitted and surrendered to His will, how then do we respond? Sadly, I believe it is indisputable the answer is generally neither pleasing nor honoring to our Lord.
Again, strong words? Again, no question. But to put an exclamation point to this writing, I will finish up with I believe I have been led to write. Family planning? What do those words imply? And what actions flow from them? Birth control. So … What are we purporting to “control?” I humbly submit to you, my brothers, the church at large, at least for the most part in America today, is far too casual in answering these questions.
We are called to be “salt and light” in this world. How does the world view us? More specifically, is there is enough of a distinction in how we live, that we are unmistakably “set apart?” In particular, in the area of how we view children?
All I am writing this morning flows from the path our Lord led me down many years ago. “Reader’s Digest version:” After about 18 months of praying, almost every morning (early) with a group of men for revival, I ended up in Washington, D.C. in a symbolic “cemetery of the innocents” surrounded by a supernaturally angry, rebellious, hateful group of protesters attempting to influence the latest case before the Supreme Court regarding abortion. Specifically, the latest attempt to overturn the infamous Roe vs. Wade decision. For the first and last time in my life, I fasted and prayed for 3 days. The result? I came there in obedience to what I believed at the time was my part in being “salt and light,” but very narrowly focused on the evil of abortion and what it represents.
So … What did I come away with? I am not Moses and can claim no “burning bush” experience with a divine visit from the Lord. But, what to me was the unmistakably clear “still, small voice” of my Lord said my efforts were misdirected. How so Lord? On a glorious spring day in Washington, D.C. in 1989, He impressed on me the following words, as I was kneeling praying in tears in the above mentioned “cemetery” surrounded by U. S. Park police mounted on horseback, protecting us from the protesters … ”These are children of darkness, acting perfectly consistent with who they are and what they are. What about My people, who are called by My name? The children of light?”
Much detail left unwritten here about those 3 days, but these words changed my life. My response? In the pulpit, invited by our pastor to tell the church what the Lord had shown me, I said, “Abortion is the tip of the iceberg. It is the most extreme form of birth control.” Well, I imagine it will come as no shock to you the pastor got me out of the pulpit as quickly and graciously as he could manage under the circumstances. He and all in attendance were certainly anticipating some sort on presentation focused on the evils of “them out there,” when instead I was clearly “stepping on toes” and talking about “us in here” … You get the picture. And here I am again this morning saying to the leaders of our local church what I was led to say then.
To be crystal clear, do I believe His word unmistakably, unequivocally condemns birth control. No, I cannot refer you to verses which precisely make that statement. And, yes, again having “been through the wars” over a long period of time, I am very familiar with all of the typical arguments against taking this position. From incredible “logical and theological spins” generally centered around some version of trying to combine evolution with the Truth, to legalism, self-righteousness, etc. etc. I mean all of them. And, yes, I am equally very clear about and familiar with what follows if we surrender this fundamental part of our walk through this world to our Lord. You are faced with a much deeper challenge to “wrestle with” more narrowly focused topics like the covenant of marriage, what it truly represents, and then the subsequent preparations to enter into it (“I go to prepare a place for you …”), to broader topics like what it means “to walk by faith.” Again, much could be written here …
I humbly submit to you, my brothers in Christ, that I absolutely believe the church needs to be much more thoughtful about this topic and approach it with a great deal more humility and reverential awe. As the sovereign and ultimate creator of all there is, as the Author of Life, is there any higher form or expression of His creative work than children? If we can fully absorb and understand His telling us we are created in His image, then what does that suggest the answer is?
And how then should we respond?
As our Lord leads, I welcome any follow-up discussions, as seems best to you.
In Him, have a blessed day!
Respectfully yours in Christ,
P.S. For what it is worth, while no claim is made that is it “fully inspired” like His word to us, the Bible, after surrendering my own life in this area, I read a book titled “Grand Illusions,” by George Grant. If at all moved by anything I have written this morning, I would encourage you to find it and read it.
It is a powerfully written story about the life of Margaret Sanger, the founder of Planned Parenthood. Once having read it, here is my final question. Generally speaking, with whose “vision of life” is the church in America today most consistent? Our Lord’s? Or Margaret Sanger’s?
Closing
Obviously passionate about all that children represent, I greatly appreciate the forum our Steem Community offers us all to express ourselves. I trust there will be some benefit to some of those reading this post.
Please upvote, resteem, and comment, as you feel led. I humbly request, in particular, comments as I would appreciate the feedback. "The good, the bad, and the ugly" ... All welcome.
All the best to you for a memorable Father's Day!