Twas the night before christmas
And all through the house
Everyone felt shitty
Even the mouse
Mom on the toilet
Dad smoking grass
I had just settled down
For a nice piece of ass
When out on the roof
I heard such a clatter
I spring from my piece
To see what was the matter
But on the roof
I saw some old prick
I knew in a moment
It must be St Nick
He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of hell
I knew in a second
The fucker had fell
He filled all the stockings
With whiskey and beer
And a big rubber dick
For my brother, the queer
He rose up the chimney
With a thundering fart
The son of a bitch
Blew my chimney apart
He swore and he cussed
As he rode out of sight
Piss on you all
It's been a hell of a night
I take no credit for this poem...found it on the internet while browsing around for Christmas memes. I just brought it here for you all to enjoy.
