A few years back, I backpacked in motherland China for a month before and I absolutely fell in love and I have been working here for a year. My stay has been full of ups and downs, but the ones that really made an impression of Middle Kingdom are the random awkward conversations I have with locals. Writing these made me giggle, and I hope you enjoy them as much as I had writing them.
(By the way, these conversations are in Chinese and translated into English)
🌟 At a cosmetic shop in Tian Chang, Anhui Province. Had a small talk with the shop keeper. (BTW! I'm Asian with the same skin tone as a Chinese)
Lady: Oh you’re Malaysian?
Me: yeah I am.
Lady: Can I touch your skin?
Me: (Awkwardly) Emm.. sure?
Lady: (Touch my hand) OMG. We feel the same!
Me: ಠ_ ಠ??? (In my head, you think I’m a lizard or medusa is it?)
🌟 My first winter in China, I was at my favourite noodle shop and outside was probably 2 degrees and snowing.
Me: It’s so cold out right now, wish winter will be gone soon.
Lady: You know what’s the best way to keep warm?
Me: What? (Anticipating a useful answer)
Lady: Being pregnant. The baby will keep you warm.
Me: â—• â—¡ â—• WTF?
Lady: (Continues to dish my ovaries getting old and how its dying)
🌟 In Guangzhou subway, was standing by the entrance and across from me a middle age or granny was basically making a hole into my face with her intense stare. So being the polite Malaysian, I just gave a casual smile at her. WORST DECISION OF MY LIFE! As she squeezes herself through the crowd towards me like her life depended on it.
Lady: Hello girl, whaa you look so pretty. what’s your name? You from the area ah?
Me: Errr.. no. I’m not local Chinese. I’m Malaysian. (didn't wanna give her my name)
Lady: Malaysian? Speak so good Chinese! How old are you girl?
Me: Awkwardly 25
Lady: Whhaaa 25! So you married or have any boyfriend?
Me: Awkwardly Emm.. No. Still single and enjoying it.
Lady: OHHHH!! THAT’S GOOD! My son also single! (took out her phone in a speed of light to show me picture) Nah, nah this him. Handsome right? So what’s your wechat? You two can make a good couple.
Me: ʘ‿ʘ??? runs away
FYI, This happened a couple of times. I had to explain that I do not have wechat at the time and my phone number was Malaysian number so you can’t call me!
If you peeps were in a similar situation what would you had done? Holla at me at the comment sections. For more awkward moments, make sure to follow me and look out for updates on my Instagram: âš¡ thunderabs âš¡
Thanks for the love