So you want to join a Fraternity but you're not sure it's for you... Well go ahead, read on..
First and foremost I will be fleshing out some of the most important aspects of joining a fraternity in the following: Pledging, Academics, Women, Brotherhood, and Leadership. This is not for the faint of heart I will be 100% honest..
BUT let's take it back to basics... Why should YOU join a fraternity. What are YOU looking for?
-Most people join for 3 MAIN reasons and they are as follows: Making new friends, networking to further one's career, and you guessed it, WOMEN!
My main reason was 100% undeniably to meet women. Initially, I did not care about the "Brotherhood" aspect or any of the other stuff that they try to promote themselves with. I just cared about the women and the party lifestyle. As you can tell by now I did not really value education as much as I valued my "college life" that I pictured so clearly in my head. Coming in to college, I thought it was going to be exactly like the movies: Parties every night, sexy college girls on the prowl, and overall the time of my life. It was 100% NOT the case... I was lonely on campus because I was an out of state kid who knew no one. I was not accepted into parties BECAUSE I was a freshman guy and the tennis club/Hawaiian club parties were super lame in comparison to what I pictured my life to be like. It was only until I realized that it was the people who were in fraternities who got all the glory. They had friends, hung out with good looking women, and constantly had smiles on their faces like their lives were set. So I went on a journey to find out exactly what it was like to be in a fraternity...
Phase 1: Pledging-
Yes you've heard of it sometimes going overboard on national television of some poor kid that got pledged/hazed so hard either through physical means or alcohol overdose, most times a combination of the two and was fatal. One thing I would like to mention from the beginning is that I personally would stay away from types of fraternities that are notorious for these kinds of activities. The fraternity I specifically joined was PHYSICAL ONLY. No alcohol. When you are being pledged it is already a grueling process and I believe that an active under the influence of alcohol would only exacerbate the situation.
What is the Purpose of Pledging?
The Purpose of pledging is to break you down and build you back up into a groomed and better version of yourself: both mentally and physically. That's right I said physically. Most fraternities will make you do physical training such as push-ups, duck hops, army crawl sort of like boot-camp. This allows the "Actives" have control over the "Pledges" and is a method to keep pledges on their toes. A mess up in the history of your fraternity or daily pledging task will result in more physical punishment. This is a traditional process that all fraternity members MUST go through, unless of course it is the type of fraternity that does not involve themselves in Pledging.
The Pros and Cons of Pledging...
I myself think that Pledging is a good thing... until it's not. What I mean by that is that creating discipline is a good thing for many college kids but those in power aka the actives must know the limits that they have. Once an active goes too far with pledging it can be detrimental or even downright dangerous for the pledge. This is another reason why I opt to join a fraternity that does NOT use alcohol during the pledging process to keep the mind clear.
So how can you spot a fraternity that is worth joining and one that might be detrimental? The members themselves. Even before you join a fraternity there will be many opportunities to interview the members and see what they are like as people and as a collective whole. Many fraternities receive a bad rep but not all of us are bad.
Academics:
If you join a fraternity- BE PREPARED to take a hit on your GPA. Fortunately it will only be the semester that you pledge that will mostly take the hit. This is why I encourage you to join one during your freshman/sophomore year while you are STILL taking those GE classes and not later on when you are taking your classes involving your MAJOR.
Women:
Well if you are like me and you are looking to meet women. Joining a Fraternity is absolutely the best thing to join for that. If you are currently in a relationship I would NOT suggest joining one. Many times there will be opportunities to have socials with Sororities on campus as well. The Holiday socials like Halloween were always the best ;). After joining a fraternity my life became exactly what I had envisioned it to be. Hooking up with a different girl at every party and increasing my "number" to double digits. It all happened. However, your reputation will be known and be prepared to get some looks from certain women if you go down this road. Luckily for me I was always a good-looking guy so I was never really that affected. However, just because you ARE in a fraternity DOES NOT MEAN you guaranteed to get laid. It will only INCREASE the CHANCES. If you are even moderately half good looking things are looking up for you!
Brotherhood:
This was honestly the best thing that came out of joining a fraternity even more so than the women. After looking back at my college career the bonds that I have created with my brothers DURING the pledging process is absolutely immutable. They really are my brothers and I will be calling them to my wedding day. When you are going through something as grueling as pledging, you will always remember the one's who went through with it WITH you. I can say that if I ever needed their help sometime down the road they will come without a doubt, because I would do the same for them...
Leadership:
One of the most important skills in life is to be a good leader. But as they say in order to be a good leader you had to have been a good follower as well. This is really the end game of the pledging process. The transition from a follower into a leader! Once you become inducted as a member it is now YOUR DUTY to keep the traditions of the fraternity alive. Yes at some point the older actives will graduate and YOU MUST take the REIGNS!! This is a skill that can also be applied in real life such as a job in management... AHA now all the pieces come together.
Conclusion:
I 100% encourage all of you who are reading this that are about to enroll in college to absolutely take the opportunity to checking out your fraternities on campus. Just make sure that they are cool individuals with like-minded goals. There are going to be times when you want to quit.. We all go through that. But just remember on the other side is glory, women, and the time of your life with the people of your life!!
