You Are So Much More (for my friend @girlbeforemirror)

I went and got some art supplies the other day, because I wanted to make something for one of my friends. She is doing an art competition for her birthday, which she decided to invite all of us to celebrate with her HERE. I want to go ahead and clear this up, I'm not entering the competition to win money, but I wanted to enter it for another reason which I'll share below. I'm not going to get into anything that I don't think she'd want me to share, but it's good to remember that we are all fighting our own wars and sometimes others have no idea and don't consider the impact they have on us or that we have on them. I would encourage anyone that wants to understand what I'm talking about to read the post she made sharing her perspective on this situation HERE.

Truth be told it took me all week to even get started on this project. I wrote it off to procrastination and kept telling myself that drawing or visual art has just never been my thing. Well regardless of whether or not that is true, I have a lot of respect for Hive account@girlbeforemirror for many reasons, and some of you that have followed my posts from the beginning will probably understand just how broken I was when I started writing here. I was basically just done with caring about life and ready to phone it in. Well unfortunately I'm 30 years old and didn't seem to be dying very quickly and I was also contemplating suicide quite regularly. This isn't my favorite topic to discuss, but it's all here on the blockchain if you want to go back and read and see my progression through this journey. I've mentioned to her in the past that she was one of the people that helped me get past that and just this week she helped me break down yet another stupid limitation I had put on myself.

I messaged her and told her that I hadn't started on the color wheel project I had in mind because I felt like I would fuck it up. She told me, "Draw it. Who cares if you Fuck it up. I doubt you will. That ego you have been challenging, that's who cares, that is who will judge, no-one else will." It's funny because I can remember telling her very similar things in the past and it put things in perspective. Stepping out of our comfort zones and being real with people may feel uncomfortable some times, but it can also do something else. It can save a life, it can make someone feel like they matter, and it can help people find purpose in life. So I understand if you want to identify as a zebra, I can't tell you what to relate to and I can only try my best to express why I can't think of you as a zebra, which is simply put, that you are so much more than that. We are all so much more than labels and descriptions and assumptions and expectations. I'm glad to have met you, I wish you the happiest of birthdays, and I thank you for being a friend when I needed one the most. Please remember that you are so much more than any old zebra, if you're going to be a zebra, then you get to be a one of a kind unique rainbow zebra. <3