Shallow Thought Process

A new acronym....S.T.P. Shallow Thought Process. Something I tend to judge an individual on so savagely that it has become second nature. If I don't find what I dig up by asking seemingly empty questions socially attractive, it is always detrimental to my initial trust & confidence in an individual. This takes place far before I even remember a fresh acquaintance's last name. How easily could this be turned into a pharmaceutical ad?

Do you or a loved one you know have symptoms of S.T.P?
Symptoms don't vary in age, but severity is sometimes determined based on generational rolling of the dice.

Major Symptoms Include:

• Inability to hold a meaningful conversation
• Inability to tell when you are affecting those around you negatively
• Constant worry or paranoia revolving around others superficial beliefs about you
• Forgetting you are indeed mortal
• Inability to remember simple appointments but religiously persistent in making time for small talk
• Overly opportunistic when you recognize a chance to boost your Hindenburg style ego
• Works harder than everyone else but only when aware they are being observed

Most who have had to rely on someone affected by S.T.P have also been temporarily afflicted by similar symptoms.

S.T.P is verbally contagious.

It can feed off of context in the environment, clouding up even the most vivid of thoughts. When caught in someone's S.T.P, divert eye contact suddenly & feign absolute stoic catatonia. Depending on how long you can go without blinking to hydrate your now emotionally devoid pupils, most of S.T.P's effects will decrease in effectiveness quickly until it is completely diluted by reality & logical thought. At this point, most sufferer's of S.T.P will lose interest & search for the nearest source of food to stuff their elastic gullets.

Severe S.T.P

If all else fails, you might have to hurt the sufferer's feelings and inform them of their kiddie pool level intellect. The only known cure for full blown S.T.P is complete isolation from society. Please contact a deep thinker if you experience any of the symptoms of Shallow Thought Process.

Disclaimer: Papa Sloppa is not a doctor

Let me know in the comments if you have to deal with S.T.P sufferers on a daily or weekly basis.
How you do handle it?
Is it actually you who suffers from it?

Thanks for reading!