The following is an entry for the #comedymeetart competion hosted by 
I was so tremendously moved by americancarnage’s so eloquent post about Albert Einstein and what those at the time described as a dirty drain hair fetish that I decided to continue building awareness of the dark years surrounding this important topic. For those of you not familiar with his post or this troubling time in history, I urge you to please read it before continuing:
https://steemit.com/funny/@americancarnage/wow-most-people-know-einstein-for-his-genius-in-physics-but-his-real-passion-was-to-go-into-other-people-s-bathrooms-and-search
It is so unfortunate that Einstein lived in a time before bathtub/shower drain spelunking was a widely accepted behavior. Like Einstein, the majority of people with what is known today as a benign inclination were highly intelligent. It’s a shame that so many of these pioneers ended up settling for careers as lowly plumbers. Although this menial trade obviously offered them close proximity to engage in hair/drain exploration, many sacrificed the opportunity to become famous physicists, mathematicians, economists and the like. Just ponder about the discoveries that did not occur or were delayed due to the stigma associated with what at the time was thought of as a perverse and disgusting hair clog fetish.
I guess we should be proud that humankind has evolved from these dark times. Those who today identify as drain explorers do go on to live quite meaningful lives. They can exhibit the joy when touching a clump of hair without being embarrassed or feeling ashamed. Today they are embraced by most civilized societies.
To expand on the history of Albert’s personal situation, I recall learning in graduate school about the letter that Einstein sent to Roosevelt. We learned that the rumors were true, it was indeed sent by “Hair Mail” and it sits on exhibit today in the United States Postal Service exhibit in the Smithsonian in Washington, DC.
We also learned about Albert Ghiorso’s identification of a new plutonium isotope that was first created from a hydrogen bomb test and produced from the decay of Californium. Ghiorso was also a lover of drain hair and as a tribute named the element that sits in position 99 on the periodic table as Einsteinium.
I digress slightly, but it is a little-known fact that Robert California, the fictitious character in season 7 of “The Office” played by James Spader was initially cast as Robert Californium as a salute to Ghiorso’s salute to Einstein, but this double salute was changed at the last minute as it was thought that those in rural America who to this day, don’t respect those with the affinity for drain hair would boycott the show. (Hey – do you think that may have been the longest run-on sentence yet on the Steem platform?)
We have come a long way, since Einstein’s pioneering days for his fellow enjoyers of matted hair, but we still have a long way to go. Companies around the world still ignore the holiness of the hair clog, and regularly demonize the very hair clumps that are so sacred to some just because they prevent water from flowing freely. The major players that are complicit are Roto-Rooter, Draino and Liquid Plumber and I urge you to boycott their products and services as it is an affront to our special friends. If we don’t stand up to them all the efforts of those before us, just go down the drain.
