Flash fiction entry for @rhondaK and @carolkean's contest. See rules here!
Filled with a horrid terror so strong she could not contain it, she rushed out the front door onto the stoop and tried to scream, but the terror clamped her throat. Time was running out, and she needed to scream, but each breath was strangled in her chest – she needed to scream, for someone to hear her - that was the only way to survive…
*****
The recurring nightmare Jess had as a child would resurface in her mind at strange times, soon followed by memories of her mother’s efforts to comfort her - holding her, rocking her, hushing her sobbing cries into silence. Now, as she held her own newborn daughter, thoughts of the dream were quickly replaced.Her own childhood’s strict rules and forced conformity smothered a part of Jess’s soul that turned itself into fire to survive. This fire needed freedom and Jess found it by running away from most things. Now it was time to change. Listening to her daughter’s coos, and gazing into her innocent eyes – Jess felt something within her that could be a fair trade for freedom. Love could be the hearth for her fire.It was a struggle, and Jess couldn’t do it alone. They lived with her mother and Jess worked night hours for better pay. Sometimes in the wee hours she’d wake her daughter and the two would laugh and bake. Her daughter was smart, and pride added fuel to her heart’s fire.Time passed, the strain grew, and the fire needed air. Jess started to spend time away, and the freedom was powerfully enticing. She could still love her daughter from afar, but the daughter did not understand.When Jess did return, she would fight with her mother, and then stay away longer. One afternoon she returned in a rush to grab a few things before leaving again. Her daughter begged to come, but freedom had taken hold, and it wouldn’t be questioned, and it wouldn’t be threatened…but Jess did love the girl. Jess looked at her mother and then her daughter, and told them both to hurry - she would wait a few minutes, but then would have to leave.The young girl looked up at her grandmother and a flurry of chaos started to spin around her. “You need these things, this and that, and we need to hurry and get it fast…” The girl’s heart beat faster and faster. Please don’t let her leave again. She didn’t need freedom, she needed her mother, and she had to hurry or all would be lost.Desperately gathering the last of her things, she rushed out the front door onto the stoop…just in time to see her mother drive away. She tried to scream, but the anguish clamped her throat. She tried to scream again, running out onto the lawn, but her cries would forever be unheard.
*****
Jess, caught in her freedom, speeding off to chase her plans, had a fleeting recollection of a childhood dream, and then…nothing more.