In this post I will be dealing with issues that have to do with marital relationship especially at the point of saying “I DO”.
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A lot of people in marital relationship have said I do to their partners, and they don’t even know some basic things they needed to know about that person before getting married to him. Yet they are living together.
Ask me if the above statement is possible and I will tell you YES.
In marriage, you are not meant to ENDURE IT but to ENJOY IT, and that is why is called marital bliss. What will determine whether you will endure or enjoy it, will have to do with what you are doing while you are still in courtship with that your partner now..
senseportal.org
Majority of couples are living with a stranger when the person supposed to be their partners and not A STRANGER. This is one of the reasons why the rates of divorcees are on the increase every day, hereby, given way to single mothers and fathers.
This is my question to you; ARE YOU MATURED ENOUGH TO GET MARRIED? Before you say I do to your partner you need to DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT IN THAT RELATIONSHIP.
WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT?
Decisions that needed to be taken at this stage must be with deeper considerations i.e. a lot of deep thinking and analysis must have gone into it. We are given the ability to make choices as humans. But remember that whatever decision or choice you are taken now; you must be ready to face it’s consequences either positive or negative.
There are things to note before making choices (decisions) most especially marital related decisions;
• Have as many information as you can have about the person you want get married to. The time of courtship is the time to know things about each other. It is the time to ask questions and expect answers to them. Period to know how your partner will reacts to different issues that might pop up. For example, issues on things like finances, family pressure, health, and so on.
• Consider the outcomes of making that decision. Remember the journey of thousand miles will always starts with the end in mind. What are your expectations at the short and long run?
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• Weigh the options before you. Don’t just be chosen, but also be the chooser. See yourself as someone that will gain/loss if something happen to that relationship. Get ready to face whatever will come with the choice you are making at that point in time.
• Quality decision must be made prayerfully.
My mentor said ‘’ Face value sometimes is a false impression’’ i.e. you need discernment. Humans pretend a lot but you can’t afford to fall for all that.
• Make sure you seek proper counsel before making that decision. No one is an Island of knowledge. Always know that some people have been there before you. Experience cannot be taken for granted.
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• A good decision is never taken in haste. Are you sure you are not under any form of pressure or threat while making this decision?
Someone said’’ when you run into a thing without proper consideration then be ready to run out of it burnt or hurt’’.
• Life goals of the other person must be duly considered. The reason why this is very important is to avert conflict of interest. To be sure you are both on the same page concerning certain issues.
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• Moral and spiritual believes. Do you have the same view about some spiritual issues? For example, if you don’t believe in someone taken alcohol, and the came home one day and find him or her drinking. Will you still want to continue with that marriage? Such should be settled during courtship. Don’t be deceived.
• Emotional Stability. How emotionally balance is he/she? Can he control his sexual urge and not mess around if you are not with him for a period of time? In my own opinion, this might be some of the things you need to watch out for during courtship just before saying “I DO”. Divorce is not good. It after effect does not ones emotions.
• Health Issues i.e. things that has to do with his or her genotype, blood group, medical history of the family of your partner. These are things that lead to problem in marriage. Don’t try to hide away from them. Ask yourself if you can still love the person if your find out later in your marriage he used to be a drug addicts or he lied about his genotype
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• Background issue. This particular point is always taken very serious in my country. Parents want to know his tribe and his family background. Such things can even make your parent not to support you getting married to him/her. Or should I say hope his background will not be an issue later in the future?
The decision to say “I DO” is not something you just get yourself involved with without seriously considering all or some of these above mentioned points. Marriage decision cannot be taken in isolation but in agreement and proper consideration of these mentioned factors.
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I know and believe that you can have a good home with an adorable caring partner only if you can consider some of the above mentioned points, and as well lay every of your decision before God for direction.
Thank you for taken out time to read this.
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