Hello Steemians,
I hope you all are doing good and I am back with a new episode in the series "The Aftermath"

Previously
The Aftermath - The Dinner Table (Short Story by @inuke)
The Aftermath - I am sorry (Short Story by @inuke)

It has already been 5 minutes at the dinner table, The time when all the four members of the family used to dine together is now reduced to two people sitting opposite to each other, trying to finish their dinner as quickly as possible to avoid awkwardness.

"Where is brother?" I finally took the initiative.

"He is out with his friends and won't be back till tomorrow" Mother replied. The sharpness in her voice has reduced and it felt like she wanted to talk, but she was hesitating. I didn't inquire about dad, as that will open different issues on the dinner table.

"So, Its just us?" I again tried to engage her in a conversation.

"Yes, Looks like it." She concurred.

Again the silence engulfed the room. I was just remembering how cheerful and full of life these dinners used to be. And how they were asking about how my day went and would be cracking jokes on my friend. And how badly I fight to defend them. I miss those days. I never appreciated the moment that I lived. But, now I need them the most. It feels like I am in a coma, Not even worse, It feels like I died and am haunting the home. Dad ignores me. Maa, is just there. Brother, well he tried. Now, All I do is haunting, or rather I am being haunted by some cruel sweet memories. What makes it worse? Knowing the fact that things will never go back to normal.

"Chappati?" Mom offered. I was so much lost in the thought, that mom had to repeat herself.

"No." I declined. It is not that I wasn't hungry, But it is eating at that place which is very uncomfortable for me. Knowing that there are people who are constantly judging me and worst of all they are members of a family, my family. If it were friends, you can ignore, you can unfriend them. But a family is a different story, you cannot unfamily them. Even if you are the one getting banned, you will be a family member with a ban, but a family member nonetheless.

"What are your plans?" The train of thoughts was interrupted by this unexpected question from Mom and I was taken by surprise.

"Huh?" Was all I could manage to utter. Perhaps, It was the first time in a week that she has spoken to me as a person or was I be dreaming?

"I asked about your plans. What are your plans?" Mom asked again.

"What plans?"

"About future?" Mom asked.

Now this was something that I myself haven't thought about. for past couple of weeks, I was so occupied with this drama. I was so busy living and explaining and thinking useless thoughts that I forgot to plan my future ahead. I was a lesbian in the country where homosexuality was crime up until last week. Do I want to live my life in shadows or should I be open to everyone? How does this news will be affecting my future.

"Well?" Mom exclaimed.

"I don't know" I responded.

Mom got up taking the dishes and started walking to the kitchen. she murmured something, Which I knew. I never would wanna know. She came back and picked up the gravy pot and the hot pot and without saying a word start walking fast to the kitchen. She was angry. I knew I did something to piss her off, but what?

I doubted that me being the way I am is the only problem here, But it seems like something else is going on too. I gathered strength and asked "What's wrong?"

At this point she exploded. "What's wrong!!!. You are asking me what's wrong? Everything that is going in this household for past one week. That's what's wrong? You turned out to be..." she struggled to say the word. "The way that you live your life, That's wrong? This is not right. This is not supposed to be so stressful. What am I suppose to do?" She slumped on the sofa. She was right, This has been very stressful for her too. I went over and sat on the floor and rested my head on her lap.

Minutes has passed, None of us spoke a single word. As if trying to get inside the head of one another to understand the situation better. She is angry because of me. When she was trying to get to know the new me I pissed her off. Maybe it better if I shouldn't be around her. I was about to get up and leave to my room, Thinking both of us could use some space right now when I felt her hand gently stroking my head.
"You know it is not easy." Mom said.

"I am sorry?" I was confused.

"Being a mother? It is not an easy task to be a mother. For everything in this world, there is a guide, walkthrough, some youtube video or some information out there. But for a relationship, Nothing works. And being a mother is the toughest of all. Hopefully, you will know someday. You had me worried my child." She said fighting her tears back. "It is scary, thinking about your future. How will you manage? Your life. Even if I keep an open mind. I am not able to picture you with a family. Oh My God!! Marriage? How any of this will happen? What will happen? Can you answer any of these questions? Because I can't. It is the responsibility of the mother to guide her children. What kind of mother I would be If I am not able to guide my children." there wasn't any anger but only anguish.

I got up and sat on the sofa. "You are right, I don't have the answers to any of the questions that you have asked. But I want you to know that no matter what, I don't want to be in this state of misery and uncertainty. I want my family back, and I know that things have changed and will never go back to the same way it was before. But, The least we can try to build something new. All I want is you all accepting me for who I am. And we will start working from there. We will find a way and work it out. I know it is not easy being Mother. Because I have seen you my whole life"

I got up knowing If I stay too long, I might ruin the moment and possibly the first step of a new understanding between us. I started walking to my room when I heard "But, Beta?" I know there is no way a mother would stop worrying about her children.

"Don't worry Maa, Everything will be fine." I replied to keep her calm. "And when everything is said and done, Maybe you can post a video of how to mother a Lesbian?" Mention of the word made mom cringe a little. Damn so close!!! I thought to myself. But I was relieved when I saw a small chuckle and smile on her face.

[To be continued]

I am

I hope you all are enjoying the story. Please do let me know you opinion on the story in the comment section and also.
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