The Igbo are a conglomerate of decentralised city-states that never had a central monarch, spawning the popular saying “igbo enwero eze”; the Igbos have no King. The Igbo system of ruling involved a democratic and egaliterian council of elders with no leader-everyone’s opinions were relevant and weighed until a consensus was reached. Monarchs were imposed on us by the coming of the British, who rightly surmised that taking over the region would be easier with central power figures.
That being said, traditions differ from one region to the other, but there are some Igbo traditions that are central to the entire region. Traditions, while they may not be relevant anymore in this age, are what make us a people. Some of them are brow-raising, but some are beautiful and have endured through the ages.
Ladies were decorated with dye called ‘Uli’ and ‘Uhie’ (both were from trees) beautiful body painting /art to attract attention and suitors. The Uli could also depict that they are from a wealthy family and tell stories about their lineage.
A grandma or mother who wanted to match-make her grown daughter or grand-daughter would send her on errand to the man’s family with a pot of water on her head filled to the brim so that water would pour on her body revealing her figure to the intended man. The original wet t-shirt contest.
Girls and boys couldn’t have sex before marriage, but they had a test for impotence too. The girl, who would be running errands for her future in-laws, would be tasked with taking bathing water to the man in the bathroom-under her mother-in-law’s watchful eyes. This was her opportunity to get a glimpse of the groom’s “manhood” and his response to her would tell her if he could rise to the occassion after marriage. Pretty interesting times, huh?
Wearing a mini skirt was nothing new to the Igbo community as young ladies in the olden days usually dressed in one piece cloth tied on the waist of an unmarried virgin, her chest bare with beads and iron bands around her neck and waist. This was not seen as indecent. A married woman would wear a one piece cloth from her chest to her ankles as an announcement of her new status.
A barren women could marry a ‘wife,’ woman-to-woman Marriage (Nwunye-Nwanyi). The younger woman lived in the older woman’s house as a maid and not as a second wife to her husband. The woman could then permit her ‘wife,’ to sleep with her husband and have children on her behalf. All the children she had belonged to her madam. She practically had no rights in the family.
A woman without a male child could arrange for her daughter to have an out-of-wedlock child hoping it could be a male child (this was not very popular). The child was then adopted as part of the family, with full rights of a male son. Outsiders might think the daughter had an unwanted pregnancy while behind the scene her parents (usually her mother) encouraged her to have a son in the family before getting married. However, this usually resulted in problems when the boy became a man and called names by peers.
Young girls were kept pure before marriage by keeping young men away. Young men who could not wait till marriage to have intimacy kept young widows as mistresses called ‘Iko’. They could father children for the widows. However, any child born by a widow in her dead husband’s house belonged to her husband’s family.
The olden Igbo society really never held men responsible for adultery, married men easily kept mistresses, while married women were not permitted to keep or sleep outside their marriage. Men were also encouraged to have multiple wives, because this resulted in more children to work on the farm and it was a declaration of his social status too.
Marriage was a covenant between two families, not between two people. Marriage ceremonies were organized in stages. Stage one Ihe Ajuju (The Asking) – the man and his relatives went to the girl’s family to ask for her hand in marriage. Usually at this stage most discussions happened in parables ‘Ilu’ such that the bride-to-be might not even understand the intent of the visitors. Stage 2. Ekwelam (Response). The equivalence of the western engagement ceremonies. Final Stage 3: The wedding proper which many people refer to as ‘traditional wedding’ today. It’s known by various names ‘Ibu Mmanya’, ‘Igba Nkwu’, ‘Alughum’, etc. The bride price ‘Ihe Ego’ and gifts were presented to the bride’s family with fanfare and entertainment.
Generally, Africans including Igbos had many children in the olden days for three reasons. 1- Before vaccinations came to Africa, families lost kids to diseases. Therefore, having many kids was a way to safeguard losses in case some died prematurely. 2- Most activities such as farming were labor-intensive. Therefore, having more kids provided additional helping hands to a family. 3- Families and communities relied on male children as soldiers to defend their land and women from invaders. Every man was considered a soldier. There were no standing armies.
Masquerades called ‘Mmanwu’ were the local police that enforced law and order. They were usually young men of age who were initiated to swear oaths of secrecy never to revel who wore the masks. Wearing masks gave masquerades the courage to confront deviants without retribution. Masquerades also through entertaining songs/music acted as social critics and singing about ills in the society s and could revel secret deeds / abomination going on in the land.
Any child born to an Igbo woman anywhere, has a right in Igbo land ‘Nwa Diala’ (full-fledged son of the land), and they could be titled or crowned a community head, ’Eze’ or ’Igwe.’ Children bear their father’s names, but they belong to their mother-no matter where their father is from.
First daughters, called ‘Ada’ are very respected in the family and community. Families protected and respected their first daughter more than any other child in the family. In fact, in most communities first daughters operated like a cult called ‘Umu Ada’.
The first son inherits his father’s main house, ‘Obi.’ In a polygamous society the first son is not the son of the first wife, but the first child born into the family.
Credits: Margaret Agwu