Some times it becomes difficult to break through the old customs. One of my niece called me up couple of days back. She is now 23 years old, she finished her graduation and is currently working in a full time job, where she has joined 2 months back only. Her aim is to do her masters degree in Human resources, and since I have been an HR professional she always turns up to me for advice. She wants to enroll for her Masters and along with it also continue with her job.
It sounds very simple but it is not. Her father is not agreeing to it. He has a belief that now since she has a job she should not disturb that, continue working with full commitment and not bother to do the masters. Of course the fees are high and that is one concern for him. It's not that he cannot afford, with God's grace he is financially doing good and can take care of this expense, but I guess he is trying to avoid it. He is also looking out for a suitable groom for her to get her married.
His thinking is that now she has a job and doing good in it, so she should find a suitable match and get married and settle down in life. Some times I fail to understand how in today's time also some people can think like this. Not much of a surprise, there are quite a few such type of people. Because of his conservative thinking my sister got separated from him many years back, but the children are joint responsibility and he is suppose to take care of their education.
My niece was very worried and she called me up to make a decision if she should listen to her father's advice or she should go ahead with the admission. The only thing will be that then she will have to take care of her own fees. From my side there were no second thoughts, I told her that this is her time to do it. Because in the next few years they will surely get her married and then it will be very difficult for her to study. Financially anyways she need not bother, because if her father is not helping then we other family members are there to support her.
There are many who still believe that by 25 a girl should get married and settle down with her husband, otherwise she may not get a suitable groom at a later age. This is what her father also believes. Why can't these people allow the girl herself to make these decisions. Guidance can always be given to her but it cannot be enforced on her.
I have given her all the possible advice I could but then now the final decision is her which I hope is not influenced by her father. My sister is easy going, she will agree to what's best for her, but then since the father has been in control of her education, he has a say in it. Let's see how it ends up.
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