The cooperation that traumatised me - financially

Now that it’s completely over, I can finally say it: they broke me, slowly. I did not crash suddenly, but little by little during those almost 4 years of working with them. There was an invoice payment delay from their part every second month or every third month. I was lucky to get a stable invoice payment for the last 5 months of 2025, but it changed again in 2026. The most common response I got from them was a request to be patient. But patience does not pay your rent.

It is unbelievable how our experiences can vary

Some people had never had delays in their invoice payments. Not a single delay during 3,5 years! These people were paid on time, sometimes even a week earlier. Then there were a few who had a delay or two per calendar year. But a couple of others and I were always a few steps behind everyone else. I was actually told there was “a priority list.” I was never on it. So I stayed on the edge of my seat, counting days, calculating my money, tackling my financial anxiety like it was part of my job description. (It was not).

It’s humiliating to have to beg to be paid for your own labour. To send reminder after reminder by email, only to be met with no reply, or a very dismissive "please do not keep flagging this same issue". Being treated as a nuisance, when it was my contractual right. How else is the worker being thanked for, other than sending them their money on time, as agreed? While the contract itself demands precision, fulfilling KPIs, constant adjustment and flexibility, and the gentle smile of compliance from me. And then they did not hold themselves to the same standard. The imbalance is sharp; they hold the money, and I need to be humble.

The emotional toll is harder to quantify. It was the anxiety of having to sit down to create the invoice, because it meant that, when the invoice was created and sent, the waiting in horror would start. The exhaustion of being both the worker and the debt collector.

In the end, I should add survival as a skill to my CV.