I am in the middle of somewhere, in the forest, at least, physically. But mentally, my mind is elsewhere. There have been some very bad experiences in the past four years of my life. And now I'm not so sure which way to go.
And I only mean in work-wise. I mean, physically, I have to change countries. I will be going from Sweden to Finland. Finland is my home country. And now the change seems to be coming faster than I expected because my mother is sick. She has been sick for a while.
I can't really go into details about that. But, currently, the life I have known for the past four years is coming to an end. And we are changing countries with my husband, and we are going to start afresh. Again. And although we are going back to my home country, it feels very intimidating. Abroad, we have not had any safety network, and we will not have a lot of it in Finland. So life abroad has been very hard. Too hard. I am traumatised.
So when I say I am in the middle of somewhere, I say that I am in the middle of a change. And although I'm a person who is very well adapted to changes, this time, I feel it's somehow different. I'm already 50, and you should probably calm down a little bit. No, no no... ! I mean, who says that? A part of me is rebellious about the idea of what you should do at a certain age. There is no such limit.
Mental check: Do not set this limit for yourself.
But I am in the middle, middle of somewhere, and that somewhere is the change. And I'm trying to make the best of it, the most of it as we always do. And I should not be fearing the change. Change is good.
It provides growth.
I wrote this post from my pure stream of thoughts in response to Daily Writing Prompt Day 3053: middle of somewhere.
#dailyprompt #freewrite
