- You’re going to be important to him, but his kid is always going to come first.
Just accept that you are going to have to be deprioritized in favor of his kid every once in a while. Your relationship is still going to be important to him. He’s still going to devote as much of himself as humanly possible to your relationship. But at the end of the day, he’s still going to put his child’s needs ahead of the needs of the relationship. It’s not that he’s not interested in you; it’s just that his responsibilities to his child will always supersede his obligations to the relationship.
- The child’s mother might not necessarily be out of a picture, but she isn’t someone you have to worry about.
Of course there was once a woman in his life that will play a vital role in the life of his kid as well; the child’s real mother. You can’t expected to fill in the shoes of the child’s mother yourself. You’re too young, and you’re not necessarily ready for that kind of relationship yet. So out of an obligation to his child, he is still going to have to entertain having the child’s mother in his life as well. But you should know that if he’s really serious about you, then you really have nothing to worry about. Having the child’s mother present is more for the child than it is for him.
- You won’t be expected to take on a lot of parenting responsibility, but you’re going to have to support him whenever he breaks down.
Again, you won’t necessarily be expected to take on the role of the child’s mother. He wouldn’t want to thrust the weight of that kind of responsibility on your life without your consent. He is going to bear the vast majority of the load for his child as he should. But that doesn’t mean that you should act indifferent as well. It’s going to be difficult for him and he will have his low points. You don’t necessarily have to share in those low points but you can at least help pick him up to get him where he needs to be in life.
- He won’t necessarily bring you into his son’s life until you are deep in the relationship.
He’s not necessarily going to introduce you to his son as a possible replacement for his mommy. He probably isn’t going to introduce you as his girlfriend right off the bat. He won’t want to traumatize his son with having another mother-figure leave. He will want your relationship to have a semblance of stability and consistency before he can be sure about integrating you into the life of his son.
- You’re going to have to work on building a relationship with both the father and son as you go along.
Remember that your relationship isn’t necessarily going to be just about the two of you as it is with typical relationships. Remember that there is always going to be an important third-party attachment to the relationship when it comes to dating single dads. You will have to be ready to build a relationship with both the dad and the child as you get deeper and deeper into your love affair. It’s going to be difficult and you have to decide if it’s going to be worth it.
- He’s not looking for just someone to mess around with anymore.
He’s not joking around anymore. He needs to get serious for the sake of his child. There’s no room for immaturity or childish games in his life anymore. He needs something mature, real, and stable. He needs something he can really build his future around.