The last few months have not been bad. I’ve not be entirely uninspired. I feel peace. I feel good enough. I am motivated to keep going and relatively optimistic.
I have to admit though, that in comparison to my first few months here and then the first two months or so of my comeback in late November, the magic isn’t as strong. I’m not going to stay silent for weeks until the real excitement and raging passion comes back. I still have a lot to offer, even from this state of “meh”, but I would definetly like to get back to those great heights.
At that time, I woke up full of excitement every day. I didn’t need to ponder what to do with my time. I had flashes of inspiration that lasted as long as they needed to to finish the task. I saw through the skin of every person I met, and beyond the physical appearance of objects into pure essence. I had superpowers.
Once any routine, outside of working on the self, starts to feel like routine, it becomes hard to hold on to. I actually did manage to hold on to it for a while, but then when some inevitable stressful situations came up, I lost sight of it.
I’m trying not to put any pressure on myself. You can’t force passion. There will always be highs and lows in life. Things come in waves. I’m just trying to figure out what going with the flow really means. How do I invite that incredible inspiration and peace back into my daily life? That’s the question of the moment.
I may want to read some books in the coming weeks and so if I miss a bunch of your posts I apologize in advance. I will try to stay as active as I can without allow any of it to distract me from the reflective state I’d like to rediscover, where I can see myself in others and them in me. Conversations about all his help so feel free to find me in discord.
Have an awesome day. Remember how beautiful life is.
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Confessions of the Damaged - a collection of short stories
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