I completely agree with you that we all cherish the victories we personally sacrifice for. That sacrifice helps us to savor our victories.

But, where I completely disagree with you is 'we can't appreciate God's grace without people suffering for eternity'. I'm going to leave a story based on popular Christian teachings below. If you were the "intruder" in the story, would you feel comfortable telling the "Dad" in the story that you couldn't truly appreciate God's grace without the "Dad's" eternal suffering? I know I sure couldn't. Let me know, though.

THE LOVE OF CHRIST:

One night a young girl is watching a movie with her kind and loving atheist dad at home. An intruder breaks in, brutally murders the girl's dad in front of her, and then rapes and brutally murders the little girl.

The intruder is never caught, but one day he finds Christ and makes him his Lord and Savior and turns his life around.

At the day of judgment, the little girl asks Christ why her kind and loving atheist dad is going to suffer in Hell for eternity and why the man who brutally raped her and killed her dad is going to Heaven.

Christ smiled at the little girl and said, "Because the man who raped and murdered you made me his Lord and worshipped me like I was God, and your kind and loving dad did not."

Does that sound like God to you? To me, that is as evil as it gets.

"Belief in a cruel god makes a cruel man." - Thomas Paine