Depression sucks. There's no other way to describe it. Depression is one of the biggest killers around the world and yet I feel not enough people are truly aware of the impact this scourge is on humanity.
I hate depression.
Mainly because it's made me reliant on medication for the rest of my life. And yep, I will probably be in my 80's popping pills like they were sweeties in the old folks home reminiscing of a time when life was grand. Or was it?
See, sometimes we can't tell we're depressed. Sad to say but some people spend years of their lives depressed and don't even know it.
I did.
I spent at least six years clinically depressed and not knowing what the hell was wrong with me. The boredom, the lack of libido, I was never satisfied and I was always in and out of jobs. Life, it never seemed to suit me. Until I realised of course. And then I was put on the medication.
And the sad thing is that my Doc said,
"Yeah, take these, these should help" Nothing else. Just sent me on my way.
And you know what? They did. They helped a damn lot. And my feeling of helplessness was lifted above the gutter. Just a bit, though.
But you see, pills are only half the battle. The other half is setting things right with yourself. Some people are naturally predisposed to depression, like me, and others need that little bit of help to realise their true worth. Instead of y'know, staring at four walls and never engaging with anything.
I know that's what happens. It was me in a nutshell.
The first thing I did was going out for walks. Nothing like a brisk walk on my own to naturally clear my head of clutter. It seemed stupid at first, but after a while it became necessary, and before I knew it I was stopping to sniff beautiful bright flowers. No reason, only that they were beautiful
Beautiful. I hadn't thought that word in a while.
And then when I started to experience the outdoors I felt a strange need to connect with people. I was already quite lonely, but this was a different connection. Not because I felt I had to, but because I wanted to. So I looked up groups in the area and started a hobby.
We helped people in the area with varying degrees of computer problems, and as a volunteer. I LOVED it. We connected with others and each other. We shared stories and had fun and became good friends. We even LAN gamed on quiet nights. Wow :)
And by then I decided it was time to take myself off to college. Because I loved what I did. I wanted to get paid for it.
And the rest my friends, is history.
So perhaps depression isn't something that can be cured by just taking a pill. But you can take control of your life to make it SO much easier.
Good luck. And I hope this has been useful to you.