I will get out of bed. In a little while my ex-husband will pick me up to drive me to his place so I can have a birthday dinner with my two boys. But I'm feeling just terrible. This time last year I was so bad off with depression I spent it alone... not able to do anything but log onto facebook and peek at the messages I was getting wishing me a happy birthday.
I don't know what's wrong with me. I have a course I am taking for seeking employment, but I am dreading going back to it on Monday. I am tired... I'm so tired. I wish I could pull the covers up over my head and just sleep til... I don't know when.
I will pull myself together now and make the effort to have a good time with my boys. I don't get to see them as often as I like, so when I do, I make sure we all have a happy and good time. But it's hard. It's hard when you've got a depression like this... the tremendous energy it takes just to do that.
I don't know what I would do without steemit and discord #steemspeak to be honest. They are the only thing that makes me feel like my life isn't just a complete and utter disaster at times.
I was doing ok... until I got into an argument with my ex-husband a couple of days ago... and ever since then I have been in an emotional tailspin.
Anyways... that's what's going on. I wish... I don't know.
I'm so depressed I can't even summon up the mental energy to wish for anything.