Hi! Hello! 👋
Introduction to my diary series
After publishing my intro blog post, I kept on thinking of different stories and ideas to share. My head is a mess and I couldn't really come up with one solid topic for my next blog. I wanted to share a lot of things but there's this side of me that wanted to categorize everything. So after so much thought, I've decided to start a couple of blog series. For now, I will be sharing all random things about me or my life, experiences and stories, and thoughts that I am comfortable sharing for anyone to read.
So I welcome you to this diary blog series Diary of an Apple
Today's Diary
When I graduated right after college, I was lucky enough to land a job. Out of all the companies I applied, only one has reached out and I was able to join the said company.
In school, we really didn't get taught about what to expect when you start working. For background, I am a software developer (there are different terms but the work is typically all the same really).
I've been assigned to projects where I have to always render overtime because of very tight schedules. Being a newbie in the company, we were not paid for the work we render outside of the company's intended working hours. I was young and naive. I had so many thoughts of wanting to get promotion, to get acknowledged for my work, and all the things you can think of how to grow in your work environment.
Fast forward and I passed the 6-month probation, and is now eligible for overtime pay. For years, I was jumping from one project to another after completion. In those projects, I always had to work overtime. A lot times I had to spend the weekends in the office to work. Working late until 3-4am and getting back to work on time the same morning. There was even a time I took a day off but work still called while I was celebrating my mother's birthday. Work was practically my life.
I knew I was burnt out. I was getting headaches from lack of sleep and stress. I sense my body is getting weaker day by day. But there's this fear in me that I wouldn't be accepted if I try to get into another company. My confidence in my own skills and abilities was really low.
During my last year with that company, I caught some illness. It was somewhat life threatening if it wasn't discovered. I asked to take a week off, but we had an incoming project release, so they asked me to move my time off and asked for a doctor's recommendation. I was shocked as I am already feeling all the fatigue from work and I don't think my body can still hold on. The doctor even laughed and said illnesses can't be rescheduled.
That was my wake up call. I thought to myself, if something happens to me, this company will not be compensating for what lead me to this point or for my life. For the past months, I was already considering to leave and look for another work. So since I wasn't granted time off, this solidified my decision to actually leave. Although I was sorry for my juniors I left handling the project, I was glad I to get away from all of it.
After resting for almost a month, I moved to Japan for work (thanks 
And fast forward to this day, I am now working for a very good company, with good manager and team mates, I am only giving the bare minimum. But even so, my manager would always acknowledge and praise me for my contributions to the team. I even procrastinate (I still complete my tasks on time!) but everyone in the team is still very supportive.
Maybe some day, I will be able to get back 100% of my motivation, but for now I can only care about my pay check.
Thank you for reading.
Eating-Apple,
Apple