Bud: Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Me: You sure are in a good mood today.
Bud: Well, you Humans put me there. Funny lot you are.
Me: Watching the news again, are we?
Bud: You bet! Have you noticed how much nicer my haircut is than Trump’s?
Me: Go ahead. Make fun. The President is an easy target nowadays.
Bud: Oh please. There’s a bunch of lawyers out there trying to give elephants legal personhood—as if pachyderms would want their status lowered to that of humans.
Me: Really?
Bud: It cracks me up that you consider yourself the top of the food chain.
Me: Stop it with the ad hominem attack.
Bud: Don’t look at me. I’m not the one who lost their shirt ignoring my advice to short Bitcoin.